My job has led me to working very closely with the families and survivors of multiple school shootings in the aftermath as they try to heal. Every time there’s a new one I immediately flash on the people I’ve met and gotten to know and care about who have already lived through this and I know are being retraumatized watching other people living out the worst day of their lives yet again.
And inevitably in the choruses of “Thoughts and prayers” and “Now is not the time to talk politics” and “Gun laws could not have prevented this” and the other BS that no longer saddens or angers me it just thoroughly disgusts me, we will hear the time-honored “Well, cars kill people so why don’t we ban cars?” which gets answered with “A car has a purpose beyond killing, the only purpose of a gun is to kill.”
And that right there is where we’re losing the ideological battle. No, the only purpose of a gun is not to kill. I would say that the primary purpose of a gun is not to kill. The overwhelming majority of the sickening number of firearms in this nation will never be used to take a human life. The overwhelming majority of the sickening number of firearm owners in this country are never going to use their guns to kill anyone. If the only reason to have a gun was to kill, we’d be swimming in torrential pools of blood every day. These incidents are as devastating as anything that can happen in our world, but fortunately they are still statistically rare (not that that’s any comfort to the affected.)
So what is the purpose of all these guns if they’re not being used to kill? Simple. The primary purpose of a gun is to intimidate.
You don’t need to fire a gun to have a gun be a very useful tool if you’re not getting what you want. Most armed robberies do not end in death but the gun certainly makes the job a lot more efficient. A gun gives someone an edge in negotiation. A gun ensures that you can take control of a situation if need be. You can move through the world with a lot more confidence with that little piece of metal persuasion at the ready.
We’re asking people to give up that advantage. If I have no gun, I have no recourse if someone wants to disrespect me. In a world with guns, especially concealed carry – especially unlicensed conceal carry – people have to watch themselves because you never know who’s packing. Without a gun, there’s no recourse if someone isn’t doing what you want them to. With a gun, you don’t even have to pull the trigger. Just patting the pocket that it’s in can be a very effective negotiating tool.
I would wager that most gun owners would actually prefer to never have to use their guns to kill anyone. What the gun provides is the understanding that I COULD kill you if I wanted to so maybe keep that in mind before you start trying to tell me no or forcing me around.
And events like Robb Elementary and Buffalo and Oxford and Sandy Hook and Parkland and Columbine and Virginia Tech and all these just reinforce that the guy with the gun really can cause unspeakable damage, so maybe just go along with what someone with a gun wants.
We’re asking people to give up their advantage. We’re asking that they walk around the world without the power to end someone’s life in an instant. They have stated in absolutely unequivocal terms that they will NOT allow that happen.
In some ways I think that makes us an even sicker society than the killings do. Once again, it all comes down to control. A gun gives you the power to control. Overturning Roe is about control. Imposing a White Christian Nationalist agenda is about control. “Don’t Say Gay” is about control. Certain Americans believe in their god-given right to hold dominion over others and a gun is a crucial tool in that whether it’s fired or not.
Until we start talking about guns in those terms, nothing will change. The right to intimidate and control is not in the constitution. But for a lot of people it has become a cornerstone of what it means to be an American.