I’m from Ohio. We’re often boring. And we know you coastal people don’t really care what we’re up to out here. And our politicians tend to be a little boring, too.
But boring won’t cut it this cycle if Northeast Ohio native son and current US Rep Tim Ryan plans to upset newly minted and Trump-approved carpetbagger JD Vance.
I grew up in northeast Ohio, but currently live closer to Columbus, so I’ve only followed his career from afar. He’s no liberal; Ryan’s politics are more centrist, more blue-collar (the media is basically required by law to use the term whenever describing him — like mentioning Sherrod Brown’s scratchy voice), and let’s face it, he’s a middle aged white guy.
So, good for him: he won the nomination, beating out some younger more progressive candidates. But now, immediately he’s a huge underdog in a state Donald Trump won by 8 two elections in a row. Trump also endorsed Vance — late, and Vance was a never-Trumper, but he did it — meaning he’ll surely lend his voice to the campaign here and there. Don Jr. has also made appearances with Vance, as have Matt Gaetz and Marjorie Taylor Greene.
So if you’re Tim Ryan, what can you do?
I guess it depends on your goal.
If you want to make a strong showing, keep it close enough to juice turnout, and help ensure downballot races have Dems at the ballot box on Election Day, that’s fine. You can trot out the usual stuff, do the usual dance, attack JD in the usual ways, and plan to lose 54-45 and go on to whatever is next. Expectations aren’t much higher than that.
But what if you actually wanted to WIN?
If I were Tim Ryan or his team, I’d be working right now on brainstorming the ways I could shake up the race, gain national attention for myself, and break into people’s attention in a way that was fundamentally different from other candidates and recent past races. I’m not talking about stunts or gimmicks, per se, he doesn’t need to act like he’s desperate. But he’ll need something — something new, something risky, something the media cannot ignore — to up his name recognition and give himself a chance of prevailing.
Here are a few of my own ideas. But yours are surely better — and his and his strategists’ should be better still — if he’s willing to risk everything to try to win.
- Break the debate rules. Channel Trump (sorry, but yes). Trump was an effective debater you couldn’t ignore because he didn’t care about the rules. He was impolite and interrupted and attacked the moderators. I’m not suggesting Ryan do any of that. But he should do something. If there’s a podium, leave it — walk out into the center of the room and make your point. Is there a crowd that’s supposed to sit there quietly? Fuck that. Go out and get them involved. Ask for a show of hands of how many have lived in Ohio their whole lives. Point out JD hasn’t. Use your Loud House Floor Speech Voice and ask people — command people — to applaud in support of your points — abortion rights, bringing jobs back, protecting voting rights, you name it. Do something crazy that shows the crowd is with you and scares JD. Go watch the end of 8 Mile again; like that.
- Make bold ads. I’m not talking about funny cringey ads, or ads that make him look like a clown. But when the ad companies come back with ads that are 3s and 5s and 6s out of 10 on the “how big a risk is it to run this” ads, I want him to send them back and ask for the 9s and 10s. Run the ads that use hard-hitting language. Cut an ad that a station won’t run; make that a story (more folks will watch it just out of curiosity anyway!). Insult Peter Thiel, get him involved. Anything. Get on the news, get on folks radars and lips. No one watches TV with ads anyway; go crazy.
- Use profanity. Look — it’s Ohio. We’re not always the most polished bunch. The way I see it, Ryan needs to get to a place where the guys down at the construction lot can be sitting around and one can say to the others “ah fuck it, I’m voting for fucking Ryan, you know? Yeah yeah he’s a Democrat fine whatever but oh my god, that fuckhead JD fucking Vance? From fucking Silicon fucking Valley? Fuck that. Ryan’s just a guy, you know? He’s a normal Ohio guy, he gets it. I can’t vote for some hedge fund guy from fucking California with his money man and his whole slick thing he does, I’m sorry, fuck him. Ryan’s fine.” Look at John Fetterman next door in PA. That guy swears, you know he does. Maybe you stage a hot mic moment. Maybe you swear at some speech, or afterwards in a crowd, you wear your heart on your sleeve and talk like a regular guy and show how normal you are. Again — attention. Shake it up. Then “apologize” for your passion and be fine. What is there to lose?
- Be insulted about JD as an “Ohioan.” He grew up here, left, and is now back. That should be insulting. Don’t pussyfoot around it. Call it out. Name it. Ohio kid from poor area grows up, leaves, hits the bigtime, gets rich, comes “home” to run for Senate with big bucks from rich pals, expects all the locals who never left to rally around him. There should be no other image presented of him, ever — I don’t need to hear about JD the Trump flip-flopper, or JD the guy who gets it wrong on abortion, or JD the guy with the book that insults Appalachians. He’s all of those things. But other people can get into that. As an Ohioan, Tim Ryan should be pissed — righteously, seriously pissed the fuck off — at the prospect of all of Ohio being represented by this huckster with the punchable face. Keep at it. Hammer away at JD being a poser, a fake. I think by the end, it’ll stick.
- Attack some fellow Dems. Sorry, but he’ll need to do this, too. He can’t just not talk about defunding the police, or not talk about CRT, or not talk about immigration. He can’t just say he’s his own man and will have “tough conversations” with Chuck Shumer about this or that. He can’t just point to his record of disagreeing with Nancy Pelosi about whatever the fuck. No one’s going to look that shit up. He’s going to have to get soundbites out there where he bluntly says “National Democrats were wrong on xxxx, period.” He’s going to have to break ranks, publicly, on at least a few big items, in a way that makes progressives unhappy. And he might even lose a few close-minded folks; there’s that risk. But I’m sorry — there aren’t enough D votes to put him in office, with or without the far left. He needs to provide cover for the moderates and the never-Trumpers who aren’t sure what to make of JD to give him a shot as well. He can’t campaign with Joe Biden. He can’t bring in heavyweight Dems for big speeches. Sherrod Brown, sure. But few others. I’d rather see him with fucking Joe Manchin (I KNOW! but hear me out) than Biden or Obama or anyone else; muddy the waters! Let the center Rs know he’s open-minded. That’s the only way. He can either stay a purist D who maintains his bona fides and loses big... or bend a bit, lean into his moderate-ness, risk alienating a few far-lefties who can’t vote for anything but perfection, and have a chance at actually winning and helping deny McConnell his majority. You pick.
I think Ryan has to decide right away that he’s not going to run a normal race, or he’ll lose; simple as that. These are not normal times. JD Vance isn’t a normal competitor, and his Silicon Valley sugar daddy and insurrectionist political godfather aren’t normal, either. There’s nothing to be gained by conducting himself in a boring, normal, expected way; he’ll dance and strategize and glad-hand his way to 45 or 46 percent and lose going away, and that’ll be that.
Why not try to win?