Energize An Ally Tuesday
Turns out Julia Louis-Dreyfus and I have a lot in common.
We both like Seinfeld. And Veep. We both spent part of our childhood overseas. She went to Northwestern University in Evanston, Illinois, and my grandmother played violin in the Evanston Symphony. We both have the same number of Emmys. (Full disclosure: I stole mine.) We're both cancer survivors. We're both registered members of the Daily Kos community. We both know that it's pronounced Daily "Kose," not Daily "Kahz." And we both know that electing Democratic majorities on state supreme courts is super-important.
So it's a no-brainer that I'll be tossing some coin on the pile to help maintain our majorities on state supreme courts in Michigan and North Carolina, and flipping Ohio's from red to blue. As a native of the Buckeye State, it's been a real bummer watching Ohio circle the drain over the last decade or two, and having a check on the overreaches of the executive and legislative branches there is critical. So if you're inclined, you can support Julia's and Daily Kos's effort here at the ActBlue page.
Oh, another thing Julia and I have in common? We both thank you for your support. (My god, it's like looking in a mirror.)
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, August 30, 2022
Note: How come no one’s ever interested in all the top-secret documents I have in my basement?
-
By the Numbers:
Weeks 'til the midterm elections: 10
Days 'til the Marion Popcorn Festival in Ohio: 9
First-time unemployment claims announced last week, a decrease of 2,000 from the previous week: 243,000
Overall price increases in July, down from 6.8% in June: 6.3%
Percent chance that the effects of climate change have the grapes in the vineyards of Bordeaux ripening a month earlier than usual: 100%
Total number of Chipotle restaurants, the first of which just unionized in Lansing, Michigan: 3,000
Estimated viewership of the first episode of HBO's Game of Thrones prequel House of Dragons, prompting the series to be re-upped for a second season: 20 million
-
Puppy Pic of the Day: “Cleanup in aisle 5...”
-
CHEERS to easy concepts made easier. While the beltway press continues its hand-wringing over whether or not the former president should be charged with crimes following the FBI's quiet execution of a search warrant at his Florida palace, here's a convenient flow chart to help you make sense of it all, courtesy of C&J's top-notch graphics department:
Did Trump steal top-secret documents that
put our intelligence agents in jeopardy?
|
Yes.
|
Lock him up.
Any questions besides dumb ones?
JEERS to wardrobe malfunctions. Dammit to hell. There was supposed to be a launch of the Artemis I rocket carrying supplies and Louie Gohmert to the moon yesterday morning, but it was canceled because GARY IN ACCOUNTING forgot to pay the gas bill. While we wait for them to connect with a customer service representative (probably not ‘til Friday), please enjoy this pleasant distraction: a brand-spanking-new infrared pic of Jupiter, aka the "Everlasting Gobstopper Planet," that the Webb telescope just got developed at Fotomat:
The giant spot, which in normal light is orange, is the new Daily Kos colony where we're developing a secret [Redacted by management]. I can't wait to see the expression on everyone's faces when we launch the [Redacted by management] on Thursday the [redacted by management] in the year [redacted by management]. It's gonna be "fart-tastic!" [Not redacted by management, but for the record that’s not the word we’d choose. We prefer “fartylicious.”]
CHEERS to "One ringy dingy...Two ringy dingy..." On August 30, 1963, a hotline was set up between Moscow and D.C. for the purpose of keeping the superpowers in constant contact during emergencies. It worked really well. In fact we hear an aide to Khrushchev is still shuffling around Red Square looking for Amanda Hugginkiss.
-
BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
-
END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
JEERS to furry ambushes. On August 30, 1979, President Carter was attacked by a 20-foot tall rabbit with laser eyes and a grenade in each paw! Or…not:
Carter was alone in a small fishing boat when a swamp rabbit, a species of large cottontail, began swimming toward his boat.
He turned the frightened and agitated rabbit away with a paddle.
Several months later he jokingly mentioned it to press secretary Jody Powell, who repeated it offhandedly to a reporter. To Powell's horror, The Washington Post headlined "President Attacked by Rabbit." Carter was lampooned by turns as crazy, weak, and ineffective.
It was a low-water mark for shoddiness in journalism. Or as Fox News would call it: a high-water mark for excellence in journalism.
JEERS to the fog of war. Here's the latest on the big conflict that’s several months old now. There's chaos and confusion and attacks, and everybody's yelling orders and instructions. "Do this!" "Do that!" "Send them over here!" "No, send them over there!" Even more attacks are likely for the foreseeable future. They may even intensify as more and more snipers come out of the woodwork to inflict more damage, doing little but adding to the mayhem for a few pieces of silver from their evil, scheming overlords. But enough about the media's treatment of President Biden. I hear the Russia-Ukraine war is still going on, too.
-
Ten years ago in C&J: August 30, 2012
MEGA CHEERS to crankin' up the democracy machine again. If it looks, acts, stinks, reads and quacks like a shitty voter-suppression law, it is a shitty voter-suppression law. So ruleth Judge Robert L. Hinkle about Florida's ALEC-written mess that has caused Democratic registrations to drop off a cliff:
A federal judge said Wednesday he would permanently remove harsh restrictions on third-party voter registration groups that have handicapped registration efforts in Florida this year. U.S. District Judge Robert L. Hinkle said he would grant a motion to permanently remove the restrictions once he receives confirmation that a federal appeals court has dismissed the case (the state of Florida has agreed to dismiss their appeal).
It's a huge barrier lifted and, yes, there will be time to register a ton of voters by election day. Meanwhile, Governor Rick Scott gets a new trophy for his mantle: "Attempted Election Thief." It'll look so nice next to the one marked "Medicare Fraudster." His kids must be so proud. [8/30/22 Update: ten years later, the new Florida governor has created an "election police force" to arrest any Democrat trying to vote in an election with a Republican candidate on the ballot. Somebody throw up the Hinkle Signal.]
-
And just one more…
JEERS to Republican leadership inaction. It’s been a quiet hurricane season so far (knock on wood). But today is a good day to remind ourselves that things can get really, really bad really, really fast. Seventeen years ago today, as George Bush displayed a lovely birthday cake he'd baked for late fellow bloodthirsty warmonger John McCain, a swirling category-3 fetus was terrorizing abortion clinics in New Orleans. FEMA head Michael Brown, drawing on his vast experience in disaster management as former head of the Arabian Horse Association's legal department, responded swiftly and maturely:
The day of the storm, Brown exchanged e-mails about his attire with [FEMA's deputy director of public affairs Cindy] Taylor, [Rep. Charlie] Melancon said. She told him, "You look fabulous," and Brown replied, "I got it at Nordstroms. ... Are you proud of me?"
An hour later, Brown added: "If you'll look at my lovely FEMA attire, you'll really vomit. I am a fashion god."
Say it with me, for old time's sake: "Heckuva job, Brownie."
Have a tolerable Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
-
Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
Sen. Rick Scott (R-FL) is spending part of his congressional recess on a luxury yacht in the Cheers and Jeers kiddie pool with his family after criticizing President Biden for vacationing in Delaware.
—Axios
-