Plagiarism Scandal Rocks "The Onion"

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Sunday May 19, 2013 · 10:42 AM PDT

2013/05/19 · 10:42

“America’s Finest News Source” finds itself reduced to a shell of the first-rate satirical outlet it once was. The Onion's degeneration into a sham of plagiaristic deceit was on display for all to see last week when the fading humor brand published a brief article on the cancellation of First Lady Michelle Obama’s “Let’s Move” initiative.

While The Onion’s take on Mrs. Obama’s embarrassingly ineffective effort to combat the obesity crisis plaguing America's youth was basically amusing, the once-proud entertainment pacesetter left out one crucial fact: the idea was stolen from a much better story published more than two years ago on liberal news blog Daily Kos.

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Wednesday February 13, 2013 · 6:48 AM PST

2013/02/13 · 06:48

Multiple sources confirm that former National Football League Commissioner Paul Tagliabue, who oversaw the league's ascendancy and transformation into a multi-billion dollar business in his 17 years as the chief executive of the NFL, has been named the newest Pope.

Poll

20 votes Show Results

Was Paul Tagliabue the right choice to lead the Roman Catholic Church?

20 votes Vote Now!

Was Paul Tagliabue the right choice to lead the Roman Catholic Church?

Yes, the former Commissioner is a great leader for any organization.

5 votes

No, he does not have the appropriate spiritual background to assume the most sacred religious position in the world.

2 votes

Does anybody know if Tagliabue is even Catholic?

13 votes

NBA All-Star Game to be Whites vs. Blacks

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Saturday January 05, 2013 · 10:18 AM PST

2013/01/05 · 10:18

The National Basketball Association announced a major change in the format of its all-star game, which will now pit a team comprised of the best black NBA players against the top white players. Since the first NBA All-Star Game in 1951 the mid-season clash has featured the best players in the Eastern Conference versus the best of the Western Conference. But starting with the inaugural Segregation Showdown at this February’s game in Houston, sides will be chosen by race.

Poll

63 votes Show Results

What is your opinion about the NBA’s new All-Star Segregation Showdown?

63 votes Vote Now!

What is your opinion about the NBA’s new All-Star Segregation Showdown?

I think that’s really messed up, and setting back US race relations.

14 votes

This is an awesome innovation, good for the NBA, and I look forward to it.

34 votes

I am basically ambivalent. It’s just another commercial decision/money grab.

15 votes

NRA Chief Struggles to Live With Himself

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Saturday December 22, 2012 · 8:44 AM PST

2012/12/22 · 08:44

National Rifle Association Executive Vice President Wayne LaPierre admitted he has "been feeling a strange and vague sense of responsibility, and having trouble sleeping through the night," following the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., where 20 elementary school children were murdered with a semi-automatic assault rifle.

Poll

96 votes Show Results

How do you think Wayne LaPierre sleeps at night?

96 votes Vote Now!

How do you think Wayne LaPierre sleeps at night?

Just fine. He believes he is fighting for the good guys.

30 votes

Just fine. He could care less about politics but he makes a million a year.

50 votes

Not great. He wonders if he is acting immorally.

3 votes

Badly. He knows his job is to encourage death and that must bother him.

13 votes

US Government Shutting Down 'The Onion'

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Monday December 17, 2012 · 3:38 PM PST

2012/12/17 · 15:38

The Onion, a leading satirical publication branding itself as "America's Finest News Source," will soon be forced to cease and desist publication, in both print as well as Internet text and video. The newspaper, founded in 1988 by students at the University of Wisconsin, gained woldwide recognition as well as 7.5 million unique visitors to theonion.com each month, the Chicago Tribune reported in 2011. But it seems lawmakers aren't always amused, because the federal government is set to force the "news" outlet to close.

Poll

188 votes Show Results

Is the government right to close down The Onion?

188 votes Vote Now!

Is the government right to close down The Onion?

No, freedom of the press! This is an obvious violation of their First Amendment rights.

170 votes

Eh, I'm not sure. I understand both arguments.

6 votes

Yes, too often The Onion crosses the line from humor to irresponsibility.

12 votes

Google Spends $34 Billion On Pornography

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Thursday December 06, 2012 · 3:15 PM PST

2012/12/06 · 15:15

Google, the ubiquitous American Internet and software giant with a market capitalization of approximately $225 billion, announced a $34 billion investment--some say it looks more like a takeover--in the Internet pornography industry.

Poll

103 votes Show Results

Did Google make a wise decision?

103 votes Vote Now!

Did Google make a wise decision?

Yes, investing in Internet porn is as safe and solid an investment as T-bills.

65 votes

Yes, Internet porn is just awesome.

18 votes

No, pornography is always a risky investment.

6 votes

No, it's perverted.

13 votes

American Exceptionalism

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Thursday September 20, 2012 · 9:03 AM PDT

2012/09/20 · 09:03

The Trust for America’s Health announced more depressing news on the obese state of the nation. On Tuesday the non-profit released “F as in Fat: How Obesity Threatens America's Future 2012,” a 124-page document detailing the “profoundly, and clearly hopeless, situation regarding our expanding national waistline.”

Poll

3 votes Show Results

On a scale of 1 to 10, how fat is this country?

3 votes Vote Now!

On a scale of 1 to 10, how fat is this country?

I think it would actually improve our national health if we mocked fat people more.

0 votes

Really, like a thousand years ago being fat was attractive, because it showed you to be wealthy enough that you even could be so well-fed?

1 vote

The McDonald’s “Dollar Menu” is, simultaneously, both the peak and nadir of the intersection between contemporary culture and modern agriculture/technology.

1 vote

I think some readers will actually believe this story is real.

1 vote

Who Built That?

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Saturday August 25, 2012 · 6:00 PM PDT

2012/08/25 · 18:00

The Romney campaign got a nice treat July 13th in Virginia. No sense denying the red meat President Obama served up when these precise words came out of his mouth:

“If you’ve got a business, you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen.”

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