As President Manchild Donald Trump closes in on his first 100 days of office, let's check in on how his various belligerent, not-at-all buffoonish campaign pledges are coming along. Making any progress there, Donny?
There ya go. Everything's fine.
Somebody needs to buy him a few more words and phrases for his magnetic refrigerator poetry kit, though. That was a word saladesque effort at best.