Fresh on the heels of being named the White House communications director, Anthony Scaramucci, loudmouth bully-lout extraordinaire, a man held in such contempt by the rest of the White House staff that press secretary Sean Spicer quit immediately rather than work with him and Steve Bannon is alleged to have opposed his hiring with the statement "over my dead body", this glorious and wonderful new hire took to the Sunday shows to give a preview of every SNL opening skit for the next six months.
Among his first promises: Heads are going to roll in the White House if all these leaks don't stop right the heck now.
"If the leaks don't stop, I’m going to pare down the staff because it's just not right," he said. [...]
“If they’re going to stay on that staff, they’re going to stop leaking,” Scaramucci said. “If you’re going to keep leaking, I’m going to fire everybody."
What a superb way to set every last person in the White House against you from day one. Oh, this guy's a peach. Trump should have hired him long ago. Trump should have made him Vice President.
He also disputed whether Russia indeed was responsible for the election hacking that the nation's intelligence agencies unanimously agree they did in fact too. That is not new, from the White House. What is new is that this halfwit jackass did it in about the most dickish way he could possibly muster, on national television, under the apparent impression that what the Sean Spicer, Kellyanne Conway, Sarah Huckabee Sanders White House had been missing up until now is that all of those people are just too polite and polished.
Behold America's newest television sitcom character turned into a real live boy.
“Somebody said to me yesterday—I won’t tell you who—that if the Russians actually hacked this situation and spilled out those emails, you would have never seen it, you would have never had any evidence of them.”
An incredulous Tapper cut him off, pointing out that this anonymous source was breaking from every single intelligence agency in asserting that Russia’s involvement was in dispute. That’s all it took for Scaramucci to throw his boss under the bus.
“How ‘bout it was the president, Jake,” said Scaramucci of his anonymous source.
That may be the quickest any political hack has ever outed an anonymous source; that it was done because Scaramucci thought Jake Tapper would be super-impressed to know that it was the president saying the precise thing that the president and only the president has said at every available opportunity makes it, somehow, even better.
Scaramucci said other things. We don't care. We don't have to care. But we will close by noting that My Cousin Vinny, White House Edition, took to the airwaves only after a Saturday purge of his own past anti-Trump statements on Twitter, declaring that his "past views evolved" and "that's all that matters."
Prediction: The hiring of Anthony Scaramucci will single-handedly hasten the fall of the Trump White House from "a damn good clip" to "breakneck pace." His commitment to lying coupled with a personal demeanor that can only be described as used car salesman meets Enron executive is precisely what Donald Trump believed America would be most impressed by; he is wonderfully mistaken.