Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke knows that America has a problem. The problem is that too many elderly people, fourth graders, veterans and disabled Americans are getting into our national parks on the cheap, the damn moochers.
"When you give discounted or free passes to elderly, fourth graders, veterans, disabled, and you do it by the carload, there's not a whole lot of people who actually pay at our front door," Zinke said. "So, we're looking at ways to make sure we have more revenue in the front door of our parks themselves."
And so Ryan Zinke wants to correct this situation. It's one thing if they were, say, willing to drill for oil or strip-mine a corner or two of our public lands, but these "elderly" and "veterans" and whatnot are just looking at things, and America isn't getting a good return on that. So Zinke is proposing we, and stop me if you've heard this one before, put the screws to the general public so that we don't have to put the screws to mining companies, drilling companies, timber companies or anyone else.
And don't get him started about the bloody carpoolers.
Zinke’s proposal would raise that fee to $70 per car. He is also looking at possibly charging each individual an entrance fee rather than paying per car.
"Basically, one person with a pass, everyone in that car comes in free," Zinke said. "Now, whether or not that's correct, we're looking at it."
Zinke's Senate committee appearance was full of such fascinating moments. He also expressed outrage at public reports of his private jet usage on the taxpayer dime, indignantly explaining that those planes had propellers, and was equally irked at the mention of his agency spending $140,000 or so on new doors inside his taxpayer-provided office.
“I resent the fact of your insults, I resent the fact they’re misleading, I resent the fact of the doors,” Zinke said to [Sen. Maria Cantwell], the tone of his voice growing sharp.
Indeed, I think we all resent the fact of the doors. Finally, something we can agree on!