Dear Folks,
A few weeks ago, while sitting in a hot tub in San Antonio, Texas, I had a moment of reckoning. It was this: I do not want to be an angry activist. An activist, yes, but an angry one, no. This is my life. This is my community. Bush and Co are not going to take away my peace of mind. It became a moment of great resolve for me. Out of this moment, there evolved an idea that I think has merit. I ask you to hear it out, to the end. Better yet, help me refine it.
I have an idea that I am mulling over in my head about how we proceed to take back all the things we seem to have lost as a party: the moral high ground, labor, standing for principles, language, rhetoric, and the list goes on (and can be debated ad nauseum). I have an idea, and a modest proposal about how we take the first step. It is a "no losers" proposal, so I ask your patience in reading it. This idea was born of my inner pain in seeing what has happened and realizing I have no alternative. I really do have a "how to" list at the end of this e-mail, so please indulge me and read it in its entirety.
Before going into this, I want to say that the debate about "moving as a party two steps to the left, two steps the the right" feels not only premature to me, but also painfully ridiculous. I feel like we are being manipulated through a political Hokey Pokey, and in the end we are all supposed to "shake it all about" because "that's what its all about!" People are scrambling all over the political landscape setting up base camps and we do not even know the terrain or what has really happened yet. That will take months. This is a new terrian and we are all literally explorers in a dangerous new planet called Bush America, Inc.
So, the gist of my comment is this: Before we can decide where our party should best be located (left, right, center, and I do have opinions about that -- and in my mind it sure ain't gonna help us to move any further to the right), and before we just assume our positions and cry out for people to come join us there, we need to refine how we try and attract people. Swallow this pill: We are not very much fun. We are often positively alienating. We have not recognized the deep sociological need and deep hunger people all over this country feel for DEEP, LOVING, POSITIVE COMMUNITY. This is not some warm and fuzzy liberal ideal. It is a reality of the right right now.
Since the early 1980's I have been taking the old saying "Know Thine Enemy" very seriously. I was living on a lower income street in southwest Boulder, Colorado (off Table Mesa for those of you who know the city) that was one of the first "neighborhood cells" to form around the Christian Coalition, and I was invited to ALL of their meetings. I went (in spite of the work I was doing in CISPES, the Sanctuary Movement, etc. my neighbors knew nothing of my other work, just that I was an ESL teacher and had a Quarter Horse), and ate lots of carbs and listened to what people had to say. It was as scary as you can imagine. But it was all VERY friendly. I felt very welcome. I quilted. I baked. People came and cleaned my house when I was sick. Now, I get all the e-mails from all the right wing groups, including domestic home management sites, recipe exchange sites, quilting sites, horse training sites, etc. I actively participate in a few of those conversations (staying safely on the subject of cleaner houses, better recipes for cinnamon buns, and better ground manners from my horse) and listen to what people are saying about community, values, politics. Until recently when I became more publicly visible in my home town, I attended from time to time Republican meetings and church services. (Now people know me and ask me to leave.)
Here is what the religious right is all about at a grassroots level, and it really saddens me to write this: community and hospitality. And it has been carefully coopted to a radical and extreme political agenda, but people won't jump ship because their community loyalty is too strong. (Think about it: Have any of you ever hung in there with a group of friends because you cared about the group solidarity?)
So, here is my proposal: I am asking that we put a serious amount of energy in the next sixty to ninety days into reclaiming two things. We will get good at it and it will develop a life of its own that will bring GREAT REWARDS and help everything else become more clear:
- passionate love of the local
- good old fashioned American hospitality, complete with pie and coffee
I propose that we reflect deeply on the meaning of those things and activate them. I got a response from a colleague of mine in a nearby but less liberal town who wrote, "Passionate love of the local is easy for you. You live in X. I live in Y."
I think there is an error in this kind of thinking. We will never accomplish the changes for social justice we need to accomplish if we do not learn to love where we are. And I mean actively love it, and project that love of our community into everything we do. Celebrate what is very unique and very local about where we are, whether it be a great and diverse liberal town or the end of the earth. At this point, I could probably run my town's welcome wagon, and one for my workplace, too. Why? Because I live here and this is where I am raising my kids. Loving it is my only option. And what I don't love, I strive to change.
So, here is a "to do" list, in no particular order. I invite debate on this, but ask you, when you think of all the reasons why we should NOT do something positive, if you can propose in its place, something else equally positive. We are all very good at critique. Good for us. But we can tear down our neighbors houses and then we will all be politically homeless.
- HOSPITALITY FOLKS WHO THINK ABOUT PEOPLE'S COMFORT We need to think about the hospitality message of every meeting we have. Put some people (and not just women) in charge of that. Greet people. Orient them. Welcome them. Introduce yourself. Make people feel welcome. People still bake and still enjoy it. Have some warm (or cool) beverages and food. Spend a few minutes at each meeting acknowledging the people who baked and made people comfortable. (An added advantage of this is that if meetings feel more intimate and cozy, they are a lot harder to infiltrate by the right.) To those who say hospitality is coded for class, I say, NONSENSE! I grew up in a home where everyone from the homeless to the mayor were treated with the same level of decency and respect at my mother's kitchen table. I try to do that now in my own home. Hospitality is about making people feel really welcome in your home or your meeting. Caring that you are there. Making sure you can find a place to put your coat. Giving you something warm or cool to drink, depending on the weather, and maybe just a little bite to eat. Saying good-bye and valuing your presence.
- BASIC KINDNESS: REINTRODUCE COMMON DECENCY INTO HOW PEOPLE SPEAK TO ONE ANOTHER When we have any public forums, let's think about people's sense of being there. Are people being kind? If someone is not being kind, just say it, "Let's be kind to one another." Have some ground rules about polite and civil behavior. We need to all become Quakers on this one. I am stunned at how many meetings I have been to at the election that have a good quarter of the comments being attacks on the people there: You are too white. You are too left. You are too right. You are too old. You are too young. You are too inexperienced. You are too conservative. You are too radical. You don't like this. I don't like that. Yuck! And I am not talking about the few people who are mentally unwell. I am talking about the bulk of the comments. Who wants that? Want more African Americans and Asians at the meetings? Invite them and then make the meeting a welcoming and pleasant place for people to come. Want single mothers to come? Go get them and provide childcare. But don't insult the good people who came and brought their best intentions. And you think I am being bourgouis and want to remind me that the revolution is no picnic? Well let me tell ya, we just had a revolution, and it was accomplished one church supper at a time, one warm little coffee clatch with quilters and a play group at a time. The people who pulled it off may be politically very misguided, but they are not lonely and alienated from one another.
- RECLAIM DOMESTIC SPACE Consider having more meetings in people's homes. I have been hosting meetings in my home with my husband for the past few months. Lots of people come. Many come back. Some have their own meetings. But a few (and very few) people have said, "We should meet in a big public hall." To this, I say, "We have a lot of meetings in public halls. They will never be in short supply. Any person of good will is welcome in my home, and I will feed you and give you a good cup of coffee or tea." At the last meeting at my house, two homeless people came. I had invited them. One person was just out of prison. I invited him too, and he came. One of them came up to me after the meeting and said, "Please continue to have your meetings in a home. You don't know how it feels to never be in a home anymore. I like washing my hands in a sink with soap that didn't come out of a dispenser and drying my hands on something other than a paper towel. I had a real mug for my coffee." There is a place for big public meetings. We already do lots of those. They are effective in a way, but also alienating. But there is a place for reclaiming domestic space. I encourage people to take back the living rooms and kitchens of our community as a place where we do good political work. And these are places where we can care for people. And the funny thing is that when we re-offer our homes as places of caring and nurturing, it enhances us, too. Everything gets more meaningful. We didn't used to think our homes needed to be perfect to have our friends in for a cup of coffee. (At the meetings at my house, people bring the food. I simply boil water for tea and put on a pot of coffee. Okay, ONE TIME, I did make a knock dead trifle. It was great. Sorry you missed it.) So have your next meeting in your home and invite one or two new people. Be casual. Don't knock yourself out or no one else will want to do it. (Invite me and I will bring a baked goodie!)
- REACH OUT TO TEENAGERS: Most adults do not spend their days sitting in chairs listening to grown ups talk at them. Most kids do. It is called PUBLIC SCHOOL. So, are we surprised that kids don't want to come to big meetings in halls where people sit in rows and listen to someone talk? I proposed that we have a Valentine's Party for teenagers. Get some local politicians to come and talk for five minutes. A very successful event was this past summer (for adults) was at a local bar. It had a band. Our congressman showed up for thrity minutes and spoke for five minutes. It was great. It sealed my support for this fine servant of our community. Let's organize things like this (Not at a bar) around our teenagers. They will vote in the mid-terms or next elections, and we can give them what will allow us to keep them on the issues of social justice for a lifetime: a vision of a warm and loving community that takes kids seriously. Bring them to political events, demonstrations, historic places. Let's have a road trip with some kids. Let's get them involved in a local project. Kids have a lot to offer and a very keen sense of social justice.
- START CELEBRATING THE LOCAL AND BEING VOCAL ABOUT IT. I call this the vocal local! Buying something? Shop local and tell them about it. Write a letter and invite your out of state friends to come to your area and talk up why you love it and then be their tour guide for a day. Become a billboard for your town. Imagine being a tourist here for a day. Join a club. Start a club. Volunteer. Write letters to the editor praising your town and be specific. Praise what YOU value. I say we bury the not so local newspaper with news and enthusiasm for the local. Then maybe we will start to ask, "Gee, why do we not have local radio and a local paper? Maybe we should change that."
- EVERYBODY SHOULD TAKE ON ONE SOCIAL ACTION PROJECT FOR THE COMING YEAR. Forget that this is playing right into the right's hands of volunteerism. People are hungry. Kids need tutoring. Our local gardens are weedy. We have public garden plots covered with weeds that could feed people. Seniors need someone to shovel their snow or rake their leaves. Our schools need more help. The list goes on. Ask yourself what you can do and then give two hours a week and do it. Do it. You will meet people. You will be less lonely and you will sleep well at night.
- GET WILDLY POSITIVE ABOUT THE FEW SILVER LININGS OF THE BUSH THEFT/VICTORY. For me, there is one and only one silver lining to this: I am meeting some great people. The deep moral conscience of so many people here moves me. These people are becoming my friends. This alone makes me feel like getting out of bed every day and facing the small tasks ahead. And we might just get some great music out of this. I heard some new Woodie Guthrie last week arranged by the Klezmatics. IT was GREAT! Organized progressives are wonderful because we have so much heart and soul.
- CONCEDE NOTHING. BE VERY POSITIVE. I am through conceding anything to the right. Nothing. Nada. Mu. I will not even say, "Well you have a point there." No points. But I will be friendly as all get out. If asked how I am, "I am great!" I am doing important work with moral depth. I have great friends and more to meet. In ten years, when we look back on this era, I will have a clear conscience. So, when asked how I am "wonderful!"
So, my modest proposal is that we go at this like good old fashioned Americans who know how to be warm and friendly and hospitable and caring. I have lived all over the world. Every culture has something wonderful to offer. We still do as Americans. The greatest tragedy from a moral standpoint of the past decade has been the utter hijacking of all that is decent and unique about Americans for a very evil cause. We begin, as a solemn commitment, to reactivating that in our own lives.
Is this naive? Perhaps. But I invite to to consider the alternative.
Is this hopelessly midwestern? Perhaps, as my kind neighbor pointed out to me. She said, "How midwestern of you." Well, WE LOST THE MIDWEST FOLKS.
I am putting my middle aged, arthritic, thrown from a horse too many times shoulder to the wheel, and loving every minute of it. And I will be posting concrete, doable socio-political things we can do in our homes in the new year.