As a bit of relief from all the (Perfect) Sturm und Drang here, I offer the following:
Three friends - a Kerry supporter, an Edwards supporter, and a Clark supporter - walked into a bowling alley. Inside they chanced upon the owner of the place, who was also an old friend and, as it happened, a Dean supporter. After catching up on the news, they agreed to a little wager: they would bowl a game, and the losers would pay for the winner's beer.
The Kerry supporter started things off. He was a little stiff in his approach, but that didn't prevent him from rolling strike after strike; in the end, he bowled a near-perfect game.
The Clark and the Edwards supporters were next. They showed good form but managed only a mediocre performance, with just a handful of spares.
Finally the Deaniac stepped up to the line. He looked like an old pro, and as he was the owner of the establishment you might think he could bowl pretty well. But every time the ball left his hands it fell to the floor with a thud, and meandered just a little ways forward before descending into the gutter. Again and again he gave it his best shot, but the results were always the same.
As they were walking back to the bar, the Kerry supporter exclaimed, "Sure am looking forward to that beer!" The Clark and the Edwards supporters began reaching for their wallets when the Deaniac brought everyone up short by replying, "So am I - thanks for picking up the tab, guys."
At once the three turned to look at him, incredulous. Had he forgotten the terms of the wager? Wasn't he the one who had bowled nothing but gutterballs? The Clark and Edwards supporters may not have won, but at least they managed to keep their balls on the lane and pick up some pretty spares. And hadn't the Kerry supporter bowled a near-perfect game, sending his balls right down the lane for strike after strike?
"That may be so," the owner replied. "But who do you think gave you those balls in the first place?"
...and...
Q. How many Deaniacs does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. Don't look at me - YOU are the one with the power to change things in this country!