this is for real, not some day-late, dollar-short april fool's day kind of joke.
i have still not stopped reading along with the transcript and listening to the sound file of this actual sheriff's department dispatch phone call.
one choice exchange between the caller and the sheriff's department operator:
B: (stunned) Well....that is, that, you're supposed to be here to protect me.
O: Well what are we protecting you from, a wrong cheeseburger?
hat tip to crooks and liars for this incredible story. i am still laughing. anyway, i thought a moment of levity might be well deserved at this point of this very intense week.
more below the fold.
the transcript has choice moments in it (the link is pasted above and below) but you have to HEAR the exchange to truly appreciate how unreal and python-esque this call is. kudos to the sheriff's department operator for having a sense of humor and dignity and focus.
this particular exchange made me laugh so hard that it did actually hurt.
[note --> the person who transcribed the call assigned ther letter "B" to the called; te letter "O" to the sheriff's department operator. FYI]
B: Okay. She GAVE me another hamburger, it's wrong. I said 4 times, I said I want it, she said 'Can you go park out in front' I said NO, I want my hamburger RIGHT. So then the lady came to the manager or whoever she is and she came up and she said, um, she said um, 'Do you want your money back'. I said no, my kids are hungry and I have to jump on that 12 freeway. I said I am not leaving this spot, and I said I will call the police, because I want my Western hamburger done RIGHT. Now is that so hard?
O: Okay, what exactly is it you want us to do for you?
B: Uh, send an officer down here. I want them to make my order right.
O: Ma'am, we're not going to go down there and escort your Western bacon cheeseburger.
B: pause ....What am I supposed to do?
O: This is, this is between you and the manager. We're not going to force how to make a hamburger. That's why, that's not a criminal issue. There's nothing criminal there.
B: So I just stand here. So I just sit here and--
O: You, you need to calmly and rationally speak to the manager and figure out things between you.
B: She DID come up and I said, 'Can I please have my Western burger', she she said 'I'm not dealing with this' and she walked away. Because they're mopping the floor and [blahblahsomething i can't hear] they don't want to rush, they don't want to go through there....
O: Then I suggest you get your money back and go somewhere else. This, this is not a criminal issue. We can't go out there and make them make you a cheeseburger the way you want it.
here is the link one more time for the transcript and once more, here is the link for the sound file of the call.
pay careful attenton to when the mom asks "what am i supposed to do" at 1:11 into the call. priceless.