Senator Rick Santorum (R. Mongolia) says that
the pursuit of enjoyable activities harms America, and is contrary to what the Founding Fathers believed in. Apparently that whole deal about "pursuit of happiness" and about how one of government's job was "effecting happiness" in the Declaration of Independence doesn't mean what we think it means. Hmm... so what COULD it mean?
Ghenghis Khan said that happiness consists of vanquishing your enemies, to chase them before you, to rob them of their wealth, to see those dear to them bathed in tears, to clasp to your bosom their wives and daughters. And John Lennon once sang about how happiness
is a warm gun. Apparently, according to Senator Santorum, the founding fathers weren't talking about doing enjoyable stuff when they talked about "
pursuit of happiness". They were actually talking about the right to keep and bear arms in pursuit of vanquishing your enemies, robbing them of their wealth, slaughtering them, and raping their wives and daughters. I mean, c'mon. Iraq. Duh.
My congratulations to the Senator from Mongolia for clearing that little misunderstanding up for us!
- Badtux the Snarky Penguin