The whole Obama firestorm we've been having today has, to me, concisely (maybe not, since there have been a few diaries and over 1,000 comments on them) why I sometimes feel uncomfortable at Daily Kos. It's not a difference of policy- I'd say I'm to the middle of the road, maybe even a little more liberal than most Kossacks. I don't think it's a difference in goals- a fairer America and a more equal one, the end of the war, the defeat of the GOP agenda. The reason I feel uncomfortable here is simple: I feel like I'm surrounded by a bunch of conservatives who have had their polarity reversed.
When I was a little kid and I was mean to my sister, or snippy, or cold- saying things that were calculated to hurt, cause offense, or prick calculately, my mother would invariably, in the process of taking me to task, say the same thing- "the Lord don't love ugly." This community has a whole lot of ugly. A WHOLE lot. I myself have seen it. Every one of us has...but it doesn't stop us. On more than one occasion, I've posted a diary about a news event that is, say, an hour or two old. And of course, each time, I find that some alert Kossack has beaten me to the punch- usually, I read the piece, have a response, and think "I'll share this at DKos." And if someone said "I agree/ disagree, but fyi someone's diared this already" I would happily go back and delete my diary. I don't fancy myself a great thinker. I've never once titled a diary PLEASE RECOMMEND! so that I can make the sacred top bar. But nobody ever says it nicely. I always find some snide, rude comment implying that I'm a total fuckin' retard for not noticing the earlier diary. It's not that I disagree with the sentiment. I disagree with the meanness.
Barak Obama published a piece that some of us disagree with. I disagree with some of it. I agreed with some of it. But one thing of his that I don't see how any serious reader of this site could disagree with is that we are just as partisan, vindictive, and mean as they are. We don't say that "the crime rate would go down if we aborted Black babies." We don't put forth policy proposals that are designed to benefit the well-off. But for us to pretend- at least here at Daily Kos- to be kind, considerate, or respectful is just bullshit. Sure, some of us are. Some of us aren't. Like me. I myself have been a douche here on a number of occasions. But I am getting very tired, to be honest, of the bitterness and gall that fill this community. People (including front-pagers) call names, call people traitors, mock other people's closely-held beliefs, troll rate those who they disagree with, and behave in all manner of intolerant, divisive ways. Some would say that's what we have to do to win. They're probably right. But you can't get so caught up in the fight that you forget what it is you are fighting for. And dear lord, for a political movement that is supposed to be tolerant, I have seen no end of unkindness here. And toleration for dissenting viewpoints? Don't make me laugh. I once had the temerity to state that I thought abortion wasn't usually a moral choice. Yes, people respectfully disagreed. Most people disrespectfully disagreed. I was a woman-hater. I was "one of them." I was a traitor. Et cetera. This is not to say everybody here is intolerant of dissent- I have tons of favorite posters who I would love to meet in real life because they all seem to be wonderful people.
Now I would be the last person in the world to suggest that you not air your position here on Daily Kos. We're an online community that thrives on free and open discourse, and I love it. If you want to post "tubalefty is a shit-for-brains Republican-loving asshole who has no business being here," post away. I'll get over it. If you want to put some recipes down, be my guest. But I have one request. I'm going to state right here my position on this whole thing- I think that the climate at Daily Kos, while liberal, tolerant of vigorous argument, and ideologically progressive, is often mean-spirited, party-line toeing, and full of people who would tolerate just as little dissent in the party as Republicans would in theirs. Discuss. And in that discussion, whatever you say, try and say it kindly, and if you have no kind words to say, state your unkind ones respectfully. Because good God, I'm tired of watching people bring out the knives for each other at this place. Honestly, I think the discourse around here is oftentimes vindictive, intolerant, and liberal rather than vindictive, intolerant, and conservative. I have yet to figure out something more important in life than compassion for other people, even Republicans :)