Harr me mateys! Today be Talk Like a Pirate Day and I be having such fun with it that I, the Disembodied Head of Dick Devos, Captain of the Amway and Scourge of the Five Lakes do name tomorrow, September 20th, the first ever
National Campaign Like a Pirate Day in honor of the scurvy crew of the HMS Florida and election-stealing pirates everywhere!
Captain Dick, Black Betsy, Rubberduckie Ruth Johnson, Jolly Joe Lieberman and the rest of me gang of black-hearted rogues will be spreading dubloons from one end of the Michigan Main to the other, and we won't rest 'till any who dare oppose us are walking the plank, dancing from the yardarm or on the jolly boat for China!
So sharpen up your cutlasses (or Diebold key), hoist the mainsail and set a course for Lansing (or wherever there's votes to be plundered)!
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Harr. Landlubbers and taxmen been askin' me "How do I celebrate `Campaign Like a Pirate Day', Cap'n Dick?"
It be easy as givin' money to a lobbyist I tells ye. Just pull out that map, dig up yer treasure and slop the whole slew into the pockets of Dick Devos, the Republican National Committee o' Cuthroats or any politician who tells ye that yer better off under the banner of Jolly George! Twoface Joe Lieberman, I be lookin' at ye!
Ye also want raisin' the sails on yer swift boat and be looking into the private privees of yer enemies. (unless ye be of the name of Mike Rogers, then ye been doin' quite enough looking already!)
Talk Like a Pirate Day and the official page for Campaign Like a Pirate Day.