I was perusing the March 19the issue of The New Yorker, 'The Style Issue'. And I almost skipped, but ended up reading, Patricia Patricia Marx's article "Dressin' Texan-- Houston and Dallas decoded" [link is to Abstract], describing a recent sojourn among the elites of those two cities.
And my mind harked back to those days in late September, 2001 when our President advised us that if we didn't keep on shopping, the terrorists would have won. I'm sure many of you did your part. But your efforts were probably pitiful compared to the efforts of these true patriots.
A few disclaimers first:
- It's only by inference that I attribute the behavior and attitudes described here to Republicans, but these are the dominant people in the leading Republican state.
- I've never been to Texas and though I can't say that some of my best friends live there, many people whose work I admire do.
All the quotes below are from the article cited above.
Respectable people don't walk
If you can walk in your shoes, the heel is not high enough. Not that you will ever travel by foot here in the land of mega-S.U.V.s "We’d like a table for five, sir," I overheard a woman say to the maître d’ at the Bistro Moderne ... "And we don’t want to walk."
Leading America in the struggle for freedom
Dallas/Ft. Worth has more shopping centers per capita than any other city in the country, and, in the spirit of keeping up with the Joneses, Houston is not far behind.
Who says they're not sophisticated?
"Texas is misunderstood," a celebrated Houston socialite told me over lunch at a bistro where her name was also the name of a sesame-crusted baby-salmon dish. ("I’m on every menu in town," she said.) She unbuttoned her sable jacket and continued, "The girls here are very cosmopolitan. They walk into stores, holding their Vogues and Harper’s Bazaars and say, ‘I want this. I want that.’)
The simple beauty of a true meritocracy
"Dallas lives beyond its means," a Houston man who has a man-made lake in his back yard said. "Dallas is ‘Oh, you belong to this country club?" and ‘Didn’t your grandfather start a railway?,’ whereas we are a meritocracy," said a woman whom I met at a party held in a twenty-five thousand square-foot house that appeared to be carved out of marble.
Even the fortunate suffer reverses
I was led to a closet the size of your living room, where fifteen breathtaking creations were draped on chairs in such a way that they looked like ladies-in-waiting... she is looking to sell a flesh-toned Halston reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe’s "Happy Birthday, Mr. President" gown ($2,500), a purple chiffon Chanel cocktail dress ("Chanel sometimes makes me look– heaven forbid– my age!"; $1,200) and a beaded strapless Bill Blass in floral chiffon ("I’d have to be on the verge of organ failure to fit into some of these dresses"; $2,500). Lesson No. 5: The best place to shop in Texas is in the closet of someone who is planning to move from a nine-thousand-square-foot house to a thirty-five-hundred-square-foot apartment.