I was at the grocery store this evening, and for no particular reason, I felt I needed to pay my stupidity tax.
I bought myself a powerball ticket. The experience was somewhat daunting. It was like Vegas, there were flashing lights and buttons and so forth all demanding my attention.
I'm not sure why I got a ticket. I'm almost certain not to win. I've been having various buy-a-lotto-ticket hints for the past week, though.
I heard a story about a guy from Portland who was addicted to video poker on This American Life, who works now for one of those "lump sum" companies that hit up lottery winners with annuity payments.
I read some random comment here that said my chances of winning the lottery were about the same if I didn't play at all, but, why not try?
I randomly scribbled down 5 numbers and went to the Powerball website, and matched all five for previous drawing.
So, before the drawing tonight, for a scant $20 million ($9.4 cash value), here are my random, computer-generated numbers:
08 18 25 33 54 Powerball: 35
I've already decided I'll take the cash payout -- I don't really want to wait around a year for some annuity for 30 years. I'm not really going to survive for another 30 years anyway. And really, I don't expect the world to be in a place where I can be assured of a payout in 30 years, so, really, cash, please.
Beyond that, I'm not really sure what to do. Can you even walk into a bank with a $9.4 million check and say, "I'd like to make a deposit."? Is there a special line? Surely the FDIC doesn't insure that much. What's the upper limit?
As I was walking home, naturally, it started raining (it always does that when I think, "it'd best not rain on me"). I was trying to decide how I was going to spend my $9.4 million. Taxes eat up half that, but I still have like four and a half million to spend on whatever.
The requireds, of course -- parents, family, etc. I don't realy need a new car. I don't own one now, and I seem to get along fine. I could use a bike, though. I'm a short little man, and finding a cheap bike that fits me is surprising difficult.
I figure I could toss a bunch into that interest checking account and get a pittance back. Maybe a savings account or a money market. I could live off interest.
I do need a new computer. Or a laptop. Hell, both!
I've also always wondered what a building downtown costs. I've always wanted a building. Not anything fancy, like a giant skyscraper, but something modest, maybe five or ten floors. I could lease out offices, and live on the top floor myself. The tennants would adore me hitting the elevators at noon in my boxers to go to the bathroom cause "the ones in the penthouse are broken."
I'd give money to Hillary and Barak, but dude, they're already filthy rich -- do they really need more? Maybe I'll throw money at DeFazio until he runs?