Americans will soon
be required to have a passport in order to go shopping across the MExican or Canadian border. This is required in order to deal with all those Mexican and Canadian terrorists that have been entering the country and blowing up buildings like on September 11. I mean, there's been... err.... ah... *NO* Mexican or Canadian terrorists entering America using American birth certificates and picture ID? WTF?
But it's clear, this proposal doesn't go far enough. For one thing, it wouldn't have stopped the 9/11 attackers. Thus read on for this penguin's modest proposal for REAL safety...
It's clear that this is mostly a mechanism for keeping the prune faces from making those bus trips across the border to get cheap medicines, but taking it on face value (that this is to keep terrorist from travelling), this penguin has a modest proposal: Make a passport required to travel *ANYWHERE* in the United States. Going from California to Arizona? Your passport, please! Going from New York to New Jersey? Driving to the grocery store? Your passport please! Crossing a bridge that terrorists might want to blow up? Your passport, please!
It is clear that this would have stopped the 9/11 terrorists, who, after all, had valid passports and visas (WTF?).... thus should be instituted, like, tomorrow!
Remember, "Your Papers, Please" isn't just a good idea -- it should be the law. If we don't turn our nation into a fear-filled fortress state with machine-gun-armed soldiers on every streetcorner demanding your papers, the terrorists have won!
- Badtux the Fascism-luvin' Penguin