In one of the most beautifully written lawsuits in the last 231 years state Nebraska state senator Ernie Chambers has decided to sue God!
Chambers lawsuit, which was filed on Friday in Douglas County Court, seeks a permanent injunction ordering God to cease certain harmful activities and the making of terroristic threats.
The lawsuit admits God goes by all sorts of alias, names, titles and designations and it also recognizes the fact that the defendant is "Omnipresent".
and of course Ernie is right. How can you argue that God is not on top of shit?
In the lawsuit Chambers says he’s tried to contact God numerous times, "Plaintiff, despite reasonable efforts to effectuate personal service upon Defendant ("Come out, come out, wherever you are") has been unable to do so."
The suit also requests that the court given the "peculiar circumstances" of this case waive personal service. It says being Omniscient, the plaintiff assumes God will have actual knowledge of the action.
Well of course, I mean between delivering Christmas gifts, and forgiving child rapists, and those caught by Dateline NBC, God has gotta know about this lawsuit. How could he miss it. He is always on top of the forgiveness machine, he is Omnipresent after all, like Ernie so eloquently states in the court papers.
Ernie goes on to say that
It says God has caused, "fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes, pestilential plagues, ferocious famines, devastating droughts, genocidal wars, birth defects, and the like."
The suit also says God has caused, "calamitous catastrophes resulting in the wide-spread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth’s inhabitants including innocent babes, infants, children, the aged and infirm without mercy or distinction."
How can God argue against such facts. I mean God is responsible for the Iraq war, and he punished Jerry Falwell for apologizing for saying that gays, and feminists were responsible for 9/11. The heresy of the Reverend Jerry Falwell. You would think he was a mad men selling pencils from a paper cup at the corner of Lexington and east 34th st!
I predict that if this case was brought up 229 years ago, God would be summarily dismissed. yet in our advanced cultural affluent 21st century society, I believe God will win this suit!