Abandon all hope, ye who support Edwards. Your candidate is doomed, I tell you, doomed!
You should immediately shift your support to [ Obama / Clinton ], otherwise [ Clinton / Obama ] will get the nomination and will cause us to lose to [ Huckabee / Romney / McCain / the Pilsbury Dough Boy / Satan ].
If you fail to shift your support from Edwards to [ Obama / Clinton ], you are personally responsible for the nomination of [ Clinton / Obama ]. You can not hope to win, so you must change your allegiance in order to prevent the obvious problems a campaign by [ a black man / someone named Clinton ] will face come November.
It is now your responsibility to join the side of [ Obama / Clinton ]. For it is spoken, with less than 1% of elected Delegates now decided, that the election will come down to just two people and only one can defeat [ Fred Thompson / Dr. Octopus / the Incredible Hulk / Ron Paul ] come November!
You. Have. Been. Warned.