For a number of reasons (trying to exemplify "open minded" to my students, wearing my "ONE" t-shirt, and wondering what the hell the attraction is) I went to the Huckabee rally today at Clemson. Honestly, having just seen Edwards speak here, I wondered how alike they would be. And I can say now that they were almost exactly the same. Except that one of them was kind of a scary, backwards, freakshow.
I got there 45 minutes late--couldn't help it--and I was afraid they wouldn't let me in because unlike Edwards's rally, a)this one was scheduled indoors (in our volleyball gym) and b)the announcement said that Huckabee's people requested that we "be in place" when the governor arrived (!). But when I got there, they people at the door were saying "hurry up--it's about to start" and there was plenty of room. In fact, I was able to snag a seat on the front row of one of the bleachers, between a very nice student and an older woman (probably in her 80s) who looked like she was a little stoned.
Shortly after I took my place, Chuck Norris gave what may have been the strangest candidate introduction/endorsement I have ever heard. I'll try to reproduce it here, but I didn't take notes, so it won't be verbatim. It was substantively this: "My wife and I were looking for a candidate we could support--someone who embodied republican values. I saw Huckabee, and liked him, so I invited him back to my ranch in Texas, and asked him if he wanted to work out with me, in my 2000 square foot workout room. So he came out, and he did a good job keeping up with me, so I decided to see if he wanted to go a few rounds. He was willing, so I kicked him. A few times." He may have said "kicked him in the face, but I'm not entirely sure. "He took it real well. That's what kind of man Mike Huckabee is."
(I had not known that getting kicked was a virtue. Maybe only if you're kicked by Chuck Norris.)
Then after Chuck talked a little more, Huckabee arrived, to the aisle-crossing, unity-inspiring strains of "Sweet Home Alabama." Yep--the song that is often seen (whether it is true or not) as a defense of George Wallace. And it's not even a South Carolina song. Lest you think that the song may just have been a choice made randomly by the group that sponsored the rally, I should probably point out that it wasn't that the song was just playing when Huckabee arrived; Huckabee was playing the guitar (and they did the entire song.) Immediately afterwards, he told the crowd that when he was president, he'd need a secretary of defense and a head of homeland security, and we were looking at them (Chuck Norris and Rick Flair) and then laughingly told us he'd call them by their nicknames, "Smith" and "Wesson."
The speech itself was what one would expect. He talked about his roots as the first man from his family to finish high school. He quoted Jefferson and talked about limiting the federal government's power and restoring state's rights. He also talked about reducing taxes, to allow people to succeed (that, apparently being the major impediment to success down here.) He finished by talking about how he wanted the crowd to vote, and to bring all of his other supporters to vote. "But," he said, "if you know anybody who says to you, 'you know, I just can't support that Huckabee guy' you make sure that guy stays home. Just keep him in the house." He went on to say that some people say that it doesn't matter who you vote for as long as you vote, but that's not true--it matters a lot. And he wants everyone to go out for him.
A few other random observations: For most of the program, all the women (Ms Huckabee, Ms Chuck Norris, and(I think) one of the wives of the SC politicians who were with him stayed behind all of the men (Chuck, Rick Flair, etc.) That was weird. Also, instead of handing out buttons like most politicians do, there was a table set up to sell buttons, shirts, and hats. That was also weird. And then there was the "Redeem the election" bus outside. I don't know if that belonged to him or his supporters, but it too was weird. Weird was pretty much the order of the day.
It was definitely an experience. But very, very odd.