This is inspired in large part by all the recent diaries speculating about Obama's choice for VP, pushing candidates ranging from Joe Biden to Caroline Kennedy. Consider it similar to the Time Magazine issue a couple of year's back that made "You" their Person of the Year (sorry, couldn't figure out how to embed a mirror in a diary). Here's the chance for every Kossack to give his/her pitch for why they would make a good vice president. Starting with my own.
This is why I, kuulray, would make a good choice for Obama's VP:
First and foremost, I'm a white guy, and, as we all now know thanks to the Clinton campaign, Obama really needs help with this important demographic. I'm not just a little white; I'm REALLY white. I'm so white that I used to own my own bowling ball and I'm not all that bad at it. Also, I never pissed in the shower before I was forty (my good friend, Rio, who's from Chile says that's really white). Plus, I own a big-ass Ford pickup truck and it is also extremely white. I went to college but didn't graduate, so I believe that qualifies me as non-college educated and therefore, you know, hard-working.
Secondly, I drink beer. I'm not talking about Stella Artois or one of those latte-sipping Gucci-wearing elitist designer beers. I'm talking about a real beer - Bud Fucking Light, man. Because, like every over-the-hill working guy, I could give a shit about quality but I still care about calories. And when I get to drinking beers, I don't just drink one beer with a whiskey chaser to be cool and "connect to working people." I drink a fucking twelve pack, or thereabouts, Maybe an eighteen pack, I lose track.
Thirdly, I come from an IMPORTANT state - Florida. Not one of those pansy unimportant states like, well, Hawaii. I'm talking about a major swing state, a big state with serious cahones - three of them. After all, my state had enough balls to move up it's primary earlier than allowed because our ballsy lawmakers wanted us to be more relevant. Although to be honest, I don't know how much help I'll be carrying my state. Some of the guys and gals at the Sports Pub in town said they would vote for me. More, I think, than the number who said no way in hell.
Finally, I own a gun. And not some $2200 German sniper rifle. I own a 22 that I bought at fucking Wal-Mart. And I know which side the bolt action is supposed to go on even though this gun doesn't have one of those and I haven't shot it for a while because the varmints have quit digging under the foundation blocks of my mobile home. Also, I think the gun's jammed.
Oh, and I never shot a friend in the face while quail hunting.
In summary, I'm a gun toting, beer drinking, non-college educated white guy in a big-ass pickup truck from a state that has at least as many balls as Hillary. And I don't wear a stupid flag lapel pin; I wear a fucking flag. What more could you want in a vice-president?
So that's my pitch for the veepstakes, Kossacks. Let's hear yours (it doesn't have to be as long winded as mine; sorry if I got carried away).