For those on a budget, here are some ideas for cheap costumes. You can go to your costume party as:
- An evangelical. Tear half the pages out of the Bible that you're carrying. Never open it. Criticize everyone else's religion.
- A Republican: Carry a Bible and a copy of the Bill of Rights. Never open either one. (If you really want to do this one right, spend twice as much money as you actually have and declare war on Canada.)
More, and a poll, in the extended.
- Saddam Hussein: Wear only your (not so) tightie-whities and stuff a sock in the crotch to represent your "weapon of mass destruction."
- Tom DeLay: Big smile and a prison uniform.
- Karl Rove: Bald head and a prison uniform.
- Bill Frist: Dress like Martha Stewart. Prison uniform/ankle bracelet optional.
- James Dobson: Carry a baby doll around. Freqently take off your belt and whip the doll with it. (A toy dachsund will work in a pinch.)
- Harriet Miers: Lots of black eyeliner under you eyes should do it. Refuse to talk.
- Clarence Thomas: Collar and leash, get someone to dress like Scalia and hold the leash. Ask no questions of anyone.
- Michelle Malkin: (Asian descent only.) No costume necessary. Just twist your mouth into a hideous grimace while you proclaim your hatred toward nearly everyone.
- Ann Coulter: (This one only works if you're a skinny guy with a big adam's apple.) Wear a blonde wig and stuff a sausage in your pants. Carry a "liberal hunting license" and a gun.
- Rush Limbaugh: Buy some pimple cream. Excuse yourself to go to the bathroom frequently to "smear some of this on my ass." Talk about your girlfriend, Daryn Kagan and why blacks are "affirmative action cases" when they play in the NFL.
- Chris Matthews: Blonde hair. Scream a lot. Punctuate screams with "I taught I taw a puddy tat."
- John Hinderaker: Shove a rocket up your ass.