please feel free to join me below the fold. Warning -- I am freakin out.
Holy f*cking ever loving sh*t monkeys that sit in the f(cking closet and then come barreling out with all kinds of sh%t all over their faces that they then fling around the room in some kind of insane sh*t-flinging ever loving monkey-f#ck orgy, what in the name of all the holy freak f*cking freaky f}cking monkeys is f+_+cking going on in the name of all of the holy monkeys on the face of the f\cking planet?
I am really freakin out here. I am kina freakin.
Kill him? The people showing up at campaign rallies are saying f<>cking "kill him"? Off with his head? He's a f}{cking arab? An arab? "I read about him and he's a m4ther-hmuping arab?" Not a Muslim, an arab -- the racial designation, not the religious? You're goin for the big bigotry on this one -- crypto-racist polite company religious-bigotry, that's fer f*cking p&ssies, right? That's what you mean to say you eye-openingly ignorant stone-cold freaky cat-lady? Really? How can three sylables -- "an arab" -- offend and baffle so many different ways? What is the ratio of sylables to freakiness there? Like 3:11? Where are these f@cking people crawling out of? Woodwork? Is it possible that it's woodwork -- are we effectively tapping the woodwork vote? Who knew the woodwork skewed so republican? Does it have electoral votes?
I'm sorry, I was freaking out, right... So, um, Jes*s H. F*cking Whatshis name? Are you f*}{|{}cking kidding me? Are you? Is this really happening? Did I get f^%&*cking transported to like, uh, christ-almighty I don't know, f*cking 1998 Rwanda? I've never f*cking seen this in the whole of my monkey-f*cking life. Is it just possible that they could like, for the love of f^cking for f3ck's sake, I mean, just like, theoretically Stephen Hawking's wet-dream kina physics possible that the people at the McCain freak-out could all meld together into a like giant ball of freaky hate freaking and displace the earth from its axis or some kind of other monkey-related freaky-physics hate thing? Could they all turn into f8cking, like, uh, f4cking, you know, Voltron or something?
I am kina freakin. Frankly, or freakly, or f&ckin freakly frankly or frank-f9ck-freak-f*ck-frankly, I would be a little freaked if GOP rallies weren't like, all bristley with freaky shrieking assassination banshees and some kind of jelly-donut guy insisting that he wasn't really represented unless McCain like tried to like forcibly remove Obama's pancreas on stage at the debate. I'd be freakin without the black guy in the emaculate suit begging McCain to please put Obama in the same sentence with the word terrorist so that all the bigiots could get a racism on. I'd be freakin about the freaknancial freak-out, really. I'd be freakin any-freakin way? I'd be askin for a freaky-snack, or some kinda freaky sh^t. (BTW, can stocks actually go negative? Has that ever happened? If I wait a couple of freakin weeks, could I just go into the market and start demaning that people pay me sh%t or something?) Are we really here? Is there where we are? Here? Really? I mean is this all pay-back for the eating all the cracklin oat-bran, maybe? As a nation, is God angry with us for, like sodomizing venus fly-traps or something? Is that what's happening? Well...