We hear a lot about a certain "Joe" somewhere in the "heartland" of "Ohio" last night. This god damn son of a bitch is supposed to stand in for the masses of American workers getting the proverbial shaft in this country and to whom John McCain so urgently wishes to address his campaign. "Joe the Plumber," the surly, working class white guy who thinks of himself as the "backbone" of the "American economy." The guy who looks at all the single mothers and "people of color" out there as a bunch of whiners and un-American freeloaders. "Joe the Plumber" is the guy it's just really damn important for every candidate to have on his side.
I say fuck Joe.
You know, I hear Joe isn't even an independent, undecided voter. I hear he's a registered Republican. I also heard that he's not registered to vote at all. Then I heard that he has something to do with Charles Keating. And seriously, who gives a damn what a plumber thinks?
Yeah, John McCain's buddy "Joe." "Joe the plant," I should say. Yeah, I'll bet they met him at one of their KKK revival rallies. I'll bet John McCain is proud guys like "Joe the Plumber" go to his rallies. Guys who just don't think they know the full story about Barack Obama. Yeah, "Joe" thinks he's a real suspicious character. Even heard he's a secret muslim, that Joe he did.
Who gives a fuck about Joe the Plumber?
Update: From the comments, apparently that god damn motherfucker isn't even a plumber. See below for a LEGITIMATE SOURCE!
Update 2: A commenter asks "Am I not a carpenter because I don't have a license?" Did Jesus have a license? Food for thought.