There's something about this Democratic race that goes beyond politics. I moved north of San Diego about seven years ago and started reading a column by Logan Jenkins, in the conservative Union Tribune. We first connected when I had an OpEd published, not about the deeper meanings of our political system, but getting more tennis courts in the region.
Since then, I have corresponded with him often, and had several letters published, usually opposing some of his wide ranging positions on local issues. But, he never divulged his national political sentiments, which if Democratic, would have made him a target in this conservative region.
Now the cat is out of the bag.
Here's the complete column, Obama mania throws household off balance, and then I will excerpt some parts with my comments:
Marriage to an obsessive Obamamama poses a number of challenges to a journalist who aspires to objectivity as if it were a state of grace.
Here are just a few of the domestic discords my wife's partisanship presents:
Public signs of affection – For as long as I've practiced this often maligned profession, I've never once applied a political (or any other) bumper sticker on a family car. I'd rather plunge a wooden stake into my breast than plant a stake sign in my front yard. (Not really, but it sure sounds noble.)
Yes, I agree. One of my neighbors, who has an annual Christmas party that brings the street together had put up a "Mitt for President" sign. Just whose vote did she think she was going to change. The people in these few houses are my friends, part of my imagined commune. Don't want to know their politics, their sexual habits or how much money they have.
Polar mood swings – We survived menopause without too much sweat (at least in the daytime). Raised a child, too. But nothing in our 30-plus years of marriage prepared us for the emotional roller coaster of the past year, culminating in the screaming Matterhorns of the past couple of months.
After the Iowa primary, she was swooning with bliss as Obama gave his victory speech; after New Hampshire, she was in the depths of despond as the jubilant Comeback Kid crowed to supporters.
South Carolina restored her faith in Obama's transcendence while confirming her contempt for trash-talkin' Bill Clinton, the hectoring presence that, in her biased view, rules out Hillary as an admirable feminist role model for young girls.
This was the beginning of the disruption of the comity in this, what I now know to be, happily liberal family.
Junk TV day and night: Time was, we watched the tube judiciously. But ever since Iowa, it's nonstop CNN, MSNBC or, in a dry spell, C-SPAN. On Sundays, we tape five or six political talk shows, skipping over everything but presidential primary news and commentary. All the pundits – many of whom appear to be too young to even remember the Clinton administration – have become her best friends or her arch enemies. A couple of restless days before the Texas primary, I woke up about 3 a.m. The TV was on.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"There may be new polling," she said.
Unbalanced debate: In truth, there is no debate. If I say something positive about the Clintons, she'll bring up the lying and parsing over Monica Lewinsky and remind me that I had my (nuanced) doubts that the sordid affair was an impeachable offense.
As for Obama, his stumbles don't matter because he has the right face, the right body, the right voice, the right experience, the right intellect, the right wife, the cool style.
snip....
The bottom line: The next day, she drove to sunny Mexico for a brief respite from the campaign. That night, she telephoned to declare, "I'm going to send money to Obama."
Oh, God. The last fire wall has been breached. For almost 30 years, I have not contributed a penny to a politician or a political cause. My journalistic ethics and natural parsimony have been in balance. But no more.
Though it's a sensitive subject, I've asked what she'll do if Hillary wins the nomination. That's easy, she said. She'll vote for McCain and, if the Clintons end up driving their U-Haul to the White House, she'll never watch the news again. Either that or move to Italy.
After what we've been through already – and what we stand to endure as this infernal primary plays out – I could live with either of those results.
So, it's not only the Dailykos family that is going through stress over this nomination campaign. And while those who don't join in the adulation for Obama, and have serious concerns about him, can just walk away from this website; you don't walk away from a rare, solid marriage because of differing political opinions.
It's really not the difference in policy proposals between the candidates that is animating the passions of Democrats now; it is something much more. It is strong enough that this columnist felt the need to explain it, not in the tedious jargon of pundits, but as it is effecting his own marriage. And for many of us, even those without a life partner, the conflict is still there.
On this web site Hope has overwhelmed Cynicism. One faction has been told to convert, or to leave, and are now mostly gone from the house, consigned to the dreaded status of "outsider." I hope that their perspective is not completely lost here; as it is the mix, the interactions, as in a good marriage, that provides the magic.