With the race for the Democratic presidential nomination seemingly finished even before the June 3rd primaries, Hillary Clinton announced an ambitious plan to rush through legislation creating four additional states, all of which would hold Democratic primaries before the August convention.
Clinton's emergency legislation would create West Dakota, East Virginia, Newer Mexico, and Rhode Mainland. Exact locations have not been worked out, but Clinton insists that details about geography are unimportant compared to the moral imperative of avoiding the disenfranchisement of nonexistant states.
Clinton spoke to supporters at a campaign rally in a donut shop. "Each of these states, while technically not existing, deserves to have a say. The voices of West Dakotans, East Virginians, Newer Mexicans, and Rhode Mainlanders must be heard. This is America, and while I may disagree with President Bush on many important issues, we share a similar regard for facts and the rule of law, and I am pleased to say that the President has agreed to help fast track this legislation so the newest states in our union can participate in that greatest of American traditions, democratic and honest elections."
Under Clinton's plan, the four new states will replace Georgia, Minnesota, Washington, and Illinois overlap with existing states, and will be fairly heavily populated -- the Clinton camp estimated that the four new states combined would merit about 375 pledged delegates. Because of the haste in getting the states on the books and replacing every federal American flag, the Clinton campaign says they have taken on dual roles of campaign organization and the new states' Democratic parties.
Senator Obama expressed skepticism about the Clinton campaign's latest strategy. "It is highly irregular to be adding new states at this late date, " Obama said. "It is perhaps even more troubling that the Clinton campaign has refused to provide contact information for their dual-role campaign staffers and party organizers in these new states so that we can appear on the ballots, if indeed the new states are created."
"There's nothing unusual about it, " said Clinton aide Harold Ickes. "Alaska and Hawaii were added in 1959, and voted in the 1960 Presidential elections. This is the same thing, just with different circumstances, though of course I reserve the right to evolve my opinion should the Obama campaign make headway against our organization in the new states."
UPDATE: The Clinton campaign now says the new states will exist in superimposition with current states. I have amended the article.