My fantasy (I had it for years):
CALLER: You did this, Rush. You got her elected.
RUSH LIMBAUGH: Hold on, hold on--
CALLER: You got the feminazis so angry, so mobilized, they outvoted the good decent women of America. You taunted the libs until they came out in droves. You made a bad call on the war and alienated the swing voters. And now that...that WOMAN is P...Pres...I can't even SAY it...and the murdering abortionists have won and the homosexuals have won and the latte-drinking socialist communist bookworms have won and there will be lesbians everywhere--
RUSH: And this is MY fault?
CALLER. You bet it is. You and that idiot Sean Hannity. That woman is in the White House and I can't even afford to drive the Hummer you said I should get. [Starts to cry]
LIMBAUGH: Well, it is a dark day for America. But don't confuse that with the end of the world....
CALLER: It IS the end of the world. And you did it. Thanks. [Dial tone]
I lived to change my mind about Hillary Rodham Clinton, but I remember it all. I was so gone on the very idea of her, I immediately suspected the worst of anyone who said the least bad thing about her. Politically speaking, I was ass-over-teakettle.
Now, even if you're not ass-over-teakettle, losing is awful. Losing when you are ass-over-teakettle is not only awful, but bitter. Still, while while we're on the subject, let's remember something else about losing--something we all know from the last eight miserable bitter years:
Elections have consequences.
If Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens,88, retires and is replaced by a McCain justice, the conservative movement will have secured the final Supreme Court vote to overrule Roe v. Wade. That's all it will take. Justice Kennedy is the swing vote right now, and he is still--barely--on our side.
If you take your vote to McCain, or stay home, how will you explain the catastrophic loss of the Supreme Court's Roe majority?
"I was furious that Hillary wasn't nominated, so I voted for McCain"?
If that happens, you'll be able to listen to something like this:
CALLER: Rush, I just want to say that today's monumental Supreme Court decision is a great day for America and the human race. And you are a great American and I thank you for all you have done for God and our country and the millions of unborn babies.
RUSH: Well, I can't claim all the credit. A lot of it has to go--and I don't mind gloating a bit over this, folks--to the McCainocrats, to the--I can say it now, and I will--to the liberals and feminists who helped put John McCain in office. Without them, we'd never have had our Justice Megaditto, whose courageous majority opinion today has saved more lives than Anton Schindler--
CALLER: Anton who?
RUSH: I'm too overjoyed to explain right now. Yes, Jim from Mississippi, are you crying?
CALLER: I'm crying with happiness.