Last Sunday, my synagogue held a group wedding for seven gay and lesbian couples, now officially recognized as married in the state of California. This was the first such ceremony held since the California Supreme Court decision which became final on June 16.
Kehilla Community Synagogue (in Piedmont, CA, but most accurately described as a Berkeley congregation) is easily one of the most progressive synagogues in the country, both politically and religiously. But this was a landmark event even for a congregation which had been recognizing same-gender weddings for 24 years.
The seven couples--six female and one male--had each been together for many years, raising children and even grandchildren. Most of them had had several ceremonies before: as domestic partners in 1999, in the 2004 "Winter of Love" in SF while that lasted, and other ceremonies religious and nonreligious besides. (More after the jump, as they say.)
The parents of one of the grooms had also been married in a Jewish group wedding, in Bergen-Belsen in 1946 in a camp for holocaust survivors. In their words, "Again in 2008, we are at an unusual historical moment that calls for new rituals and a new affirmation of love and life."
My father and I were the musicians, playing violins with the accompaniment of a singer and a drummer. We played klezmer tunes from old Europe, traditional wedding music. We played Give Yourself To Love by Kate Wolf. We played a melody I wrote last summer in Israel.
I'm seventeen. My dad's in his forties. One of the couples was in their sixties. My brother was out there in the crowd, he's seven years old. A generation ago, nobody thought an event like this would ever happen. In his opening statement, the rabbi, who's been involved in civil rights since the 60s proclaimed, "This is... stupendous!" We all gave ourselves a standing ovation.
As always the work is not yet done, and out in the lobby were fliers and information encouraging people to help defeat Proposition 8 in November, which would ban same-sex marriage in California. But I'm confident we'll make it, because there's no turning back. Progress may be slow but it's as irreversible as it is steady.