Every four years, when the Democrats have finally settled on a nominee, we reach a point where it becomes clear that the Republicans have us totally beat when it comes to party discipline. Whereas Republicans hit the airwaves to deliver the party line, the Democrats are plagued by a swarm of self-promoters who like nothing more than the free publicity of offering 'advice' to the nominee via journalists who are eager to scribble up concern troll articles that are validated by that dreaded phrase, "Fellow Democrats say..."
As usual, we now have Begala and Carville jumping out and disseminating their poison, but it reached a fever pitch this Sunday when the New York Times raised armchair campaign managing to an art form by compiling completely banal "advice" from a number of prominent elected Democrats.
Well, here's some advice to the party hacks who just can't stop complaining: if you're worried about the campaign, get off your lazy ass and spew some f'n talking points, jackass.
Certainly, everyone has noticed the perennial weakness of the Democratic message machine, but as always, elected Democrats don't want to take responsibility themselves. Instead, every four years, they act as if it's something new that stems from the inaction of their already overburdened nominee. They notice his message isn't getting out there, so they go on shows like Hardball or they dial up Ben Smith to moan about what they think the nominee needs to do to get their message out, vainly believing that things might change if their stunning wisdom could only reach the campaign's ears.
But message machines aren't supposed to begin and end with presidential campaigns. Surely, presidential campaigns are supposed to lay out the agenda, but to get that message out, they need prominent surrogates who are willing to use their connections and influence to get that agenda onto the airwaves. The responsibility is a party responsibility, and it's up to people within the party to do it on their own volition.
Yet, it's as if prominent Democrats think reciting talking points is beneath them. They don't want to go on cable news and promote their candidate. They want to go on cable news and promote themselves, and all too often, this takes the form of them blabbing about how they think they're a vastly superior political mastermind compared to the people running the presidential campaign. Of course, if they were ever to end up being the nominee, they would quickly find themselves hit by the same problem: exhausted and overextended with constant campaign appearances, unable to convince prominent party members to go on TV and consistently deliver their message, and unable to crack down on self-promoting weasels who thrive on the easy attention that comes from bashing one's own nominee.
You won't see this problem on the Republican side. Surely, people go off-message from time to time, but those instances are few and far between, whereas "Dems question nominee" is enough of a journalistic cliche to warrant the Mad Libs treatment. Republicans, however, go on television, recite the talking points of the week, rinse, and repeat.
This is how messaging works. This is why the Republicans are so effective in communicating their party's agenda to the American people. They don't waste time navel-gazing and trying to make nice with the pundits by engaging in vacuous "political analysis." They're there to deliver a message: "Our guy rocks, here's why, their guy sucks." It doesn't matter if they don't totally agree with the platform. It doesn't matter if they like the nominee. They know that, at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is having the White House on their side.
So Governor Bredesen, Senator Breaux, Mayor Brown, Governor Strickland, Governor Ritter, Representative Kidd, you're all worried about Obama's inability to get his message out there? Then get your press people to book an appearance on the Situation Room and help him get his message out there. And the next time you feel an urge to call up Patrick Healey and play fantasy campaign manager, just lock yourself in the bathroom and shut your fucking pie hole.