you refer to them collectively as "our properties"
you can't quite put your finger on a solid number
you direct inquires about the number to your "staff"
several major news organizations release an "estimate" of the number
at last count you owned 846 spatulas
you can go a year without shitting in the same toilet twice
your 'replacement window' salesman conducts business from his yacht
properties are wired so that your "honey I'm home" is heard in all of them simultaneously
vacuum cleaner sale ads get you hard
you host dinner parties via satellite
you call your political opponent an elitist, then die laughing
you've bankrupted dozens of friends from the house warming gifts
you hire Bill Gates to program your universal remote
your carbon footprint has fourteen electoral votes
you're surprised to discover that you own several fully fitted enhanced interrogation rooms