Ok, we've all heard about Biden's alleged gaffe yesterday, where he praised Hillary Clinton instead of calling her an incompetent miserable skank. We also know that 3 out of 25 polls has Obama behind within margin of error. Therefore, I say it is time to panic.
No time for phonebanking, canvassing, donating and talking to friends and neighbors. There is only one thing to do, panic and write lots and lots of diaries about how Joe Biden should drop out. There is still time folks. He can fake an illness. We all know now our only hope is...
MISS PIGGY
Yes, you all know it to be true. It is the only way.
Why is Miss Piggy what we need:
- She is a pig that wears lipstick
- She is female
- During a debate, she would karate chop Sarah Palin many times
- She has lots of experience, including medical technician in Veterinary Hospital, spacecraft engineer in Pigs in Space
- Appeals to children
- Has had an interspecies relationship
- Has big hair, appeal to the south
- Born on a Quaker farm in PA
- Slogan can be, "Cut out the Pork Except for MOI" [Corrected as per rp8238a's sggestion]
So listen folks, we can be calm and do productive things to get Barack elected or we can panic. I vote for the later. We are doomed! DOOMED! Or you can set aside your pride, dump Biden, and say YES to the pig in lipstick
I am Gladkov and I approved this message