I just heard the craziest news that I don’t see getting diaried here! I hate to use the word "breaking", but... BREAKING!
UPDATE 1: Actually, I wrote this yesterday but I ran out of time to publish it. So technically it’s not really breaking. It was breaking on Tuesday afternoon, but now it’s Wednesday morning. Does that still count? I’m not sure.
UPDATE 2: Sorry, I suddenly had shitloads to get done this morning. I didn’t get around to publishing the diary until now. So it’s not Tuesday afternoon or Wednesday morning at all, it’s Wednesday afternoon. At about 3pm. So probably not breaking, anymore.
UPDATE 3: I should point out that I'm about ten hours ahead of the US, so when I say Wednesday afternoon, I mean Wednesday morning for you guys.
UPDATE 4: Thinking about it, all these diaries are time-stamped, aren’t they? So you’ll be able to work out what time it is from that, and then decide for yourself whether "breaking" is still appropriate. Just remember the ten hour time difference.
UPDATE 5: Although as I’m writing this update, it’s actually past the time that I published the diary. So add on about twenty minutes or so.
UPDATE 6: Although, you might be reading this much later than when I posted it. So maybe you should just forget what time it is here, in fact forget the whole "breaking" thing altogether.
UPDATE 7: I also want to point out that even though the story is almost certainly no longer breaking, in the last 24 hours no-one has brought it to the attention of this community. So I feel justified in leaving the "breaking" comment in the diary, irrespective of what time it may be here, now, in the US or whenever you read this, as although it’s no longer breaking news generally speaking, it’s breaking news on this site, at the time I write this, which is now.
UPDATE 8: Should I mention that by the time you’ve finished reading all these updates and actually get to the story, it very definitely won’t be breaking any more? Probably not.
UPDATE 9: Did you ever see that film Swingers with Jon something, the guy who directed Iron Man? Where he’s phoning the girl he likes and gets her answer machine, and he’s nervous so he leaves a bad message and then keeps leaving more messages to try to explain what he meant by the last message? Like, about 12 times until she finally picks up the phone and tells him never to call again? This is turning out a bit like that scene.
UPDATE 10: The people responsible for these updates have just been sacked.
UPDATE 11: That was a Monty Python reference, for those of you who didn’t get it.
UPDATE 12: The Search For The Holy Grail. Not quite as good as The Life Of Brian, but definitely up there. Anyway, sorry, this isn’t fucking Film Club, let’s get back to the diary. It was Tuesday afternoon, if you remember.
UPDATE 13: Yay Senator Al Franken! And don’t forget to contact your congresscritter about the Public Option!
UPDATE 14: Favreau! Jon Favreau, that was his name. Or Fauvre, or something.
UPDATE 15: Right, fuck it, I’ve completely fucked this up now. I've deleted the rest of the diary, there's just no point going into it all. I put a lot of effort into that fucking thing, too.
UPDATE 16: Recent Diary List! OMG! I’m truly humbled!
UPDATE 17: I added a poll, and then deleted it. No particular reason.
UPDATE 18: Last update: According to JaxDem, apparently it is now raining in "Jackson, Flordia", wherever that might be.