In reality, I am one of those people gay people pretend don't exist but that most gay people identify as, I am a versatile ummm, person. Versatiles are the gay man's bisexual, we pretend they are really bottoms who just haven't accepted it much like society at large sees bisexuals: gays who just haven't accepted being gay.
But that's not the point of this diary. The point of this diary is something I always sensed in the gay community, and as someone who is silly enough to call himself versatile (when versatile is read "latent bottom"), I have experienced it to some degree. I am talking about anti-bottom prejudice within the gay male community. It is very real, and has real life social consequences for men who identify as "bottoms" or who get pegged as "bottoms." Yes, within a community that outwardly fights sexual prejudice, there exists sexual prejudice.
It is best documented in this article from Southern Voice.
I write in the persona of a bottom, on behalf of bottoms, to show the fallacy of the terms "bottom" and "top."
Jump below the fold with me:
***Naughty and blunt sexual language warning***
I am a front!
The whole idea of "bottom" and "top" is actually demeaning, and it is an overt admission to a system of prejudice within the gay community.
The words "bottom" and "top" have meanings. They infer a system of oppression, not because one type of sex is necessarily more demeaning and oppressive than another, but because the words necessarily denote a hierarchy. It is, after all, perfectly fine to stigmatize the bottom of the hierarchy, particularly when they willfully describe themselves as such. And using the terms "bottom" and "top" can only be for the sake of justifying that hierarchy because they are, when one thinks about it, sexually irrelevant.
Let's go through several anal sex positions to see why it is faulty to use the words "bottom" and "top."
Here are several of the positions:
The very famous doggy style: in reality, there is no top or bottom in doggy style sex. When I am fucked in doggy style, my lover isn't on top of me. He is in the back of me. I am in the front.
Then there is standing up: when I am standing up and getting fucked, I am most certainly not on the bottom. Neither is my lover on the top. He is in the back, and I am in the front.
Ankle grabbing. Again, no top or bottom here. He is in the back, I am in the front.
Bent over a piece of furniture. No top, no bottom. He is in the back. I am in the front.
Laying on my back: Okay here I am on the bottom. He is on the top.
Laying on my stomach: Okay. Me bottom. Him top.
Me riding him: me top. him bottom.
Me doing reverse "cowboy": me top. him bottom.
Laying on our sides: me front. him back.
So, of the nine positions I listed, two are of me on the bottom, two are of him on the bottom. That cancels each other out so neither can be top or bottom.
The other five all have me in the front, him in the back.
The proper terms are front (the fuckee) and back (the fucker).
In other words, in this train, I am the engine, he is the caboose. I run this fucking train. And thus I am no longer to be stigmatized or oppressed because I am no longer at the bottom of the hierarchy.
I am a front.
Fuck me, baby.
Note: For those looking for my "All Colors of the Rainbow" meet-up diary, I am apologize for the delay. I got busy today, and i already had this written, so I posted this instead. I will post it tomorrow between 4-6pm ET.
To the rest of you: I am braced for your flames and diary policing.