A special one page edition for those who can't wait for the Lifetime Movie and prefer not to make a contribution to her 2012 Presidential Campaign by buying her book.
- We would have won the 2008 presidential election if only they had turned me loose to simply be myself. Proof? It's so obvious, I don't need any darned proof.
- We would have won the 2008 presidential election if somehow John had admitted to himself that I should have been the presidential candidate, not him. I'm not afraid to say that John would have been a great VP.
- Katie Couric was briefed in advance by David Axelrod, who I know for a fact had some job for the Obama campaign.
- I actually did think of one magazine I used to read (Look), but realized it was no longer published and would make me seem old-fashioned.
- When we sent those stupid clothes back to the GOP, I attached a note that read, "Keep your stupid clothes!" I also attached the dry-cleaning ticket proving once and for all that I am not a petty individual.
- Levi Johnston was thoroughly briefed in advance by David Plouffe, who I know for a fact had some job for the Obama campaign.
- I did spend three days at Dick Cheney's hunting lodge in order to learn more about what a vice-president actually does. Despite the rumors, I can categorically state that nothing happened between us. We killed a few dozen small animals, but that's it. Really.
- If they had let me speak election night, I would have said, "My hat's off to president-elect Obama! Oops! I'm not wearing a hat!" I can guarantee that would have brought the house down and re-invigorated the GOP.