By now, we have all heard Wanda Sykes' routine at the White House Press Corp Dinner.
By it's very nature, the evening is a roast of several of Washington's characters. Steven Colbert set the high-water mark when he was tasked with delivering a speech in 2006.
As for Sykes, who has alway been rather 50/50 with me, I thought she did alright. Nothing spectacular, but rather alright. The bit about Rush was her best moment. Granted, it's now fodder for conservative Republicans, but there's something that Wanda didn't consider.
Rush would never have been he 20th hijacker.
more below that little flip thing
in the spirit of Sykes taking the piss out of Rush, this diary may contain imagry that some might find offensive
By default, much within the comedic sphere is meant to be in poor taste. We laugh at fart jokes, jokes about fat people, people with disabilities, foreigners, and even tragedy and death.
Sykes has't crossed a line that people like Bill Maher, Bill Hicks, and Carlin haven't crossed a thousand times before.
Rush is an easy target for comedy, no matter what style you are fond of. He's got it all. He's the fat joke, the drug addict joke, the joke about the guy who's afraid of women because he has a tiny penis, and the joke about the guy who's been married 4 times and will probably die of throat cancer.
But let's look at 4 specific reasons why Rush would never have been the 20th hijacker.
1 The Payoff Wouldn't Have Been Enough
Virgins in the afterlife? How would that appeal to Rush? He wants to have someone who he can consistantly screw in the ass while he talks cod-shit about them and then have them come back and tell him how wonderful he is. He wouldn't get that from a virgin. Why would he want an afterlife full of virgins when he's been rather sucessful with fucking with Micheal Steele and various elected officials and had them crawling on their knees in drooling adoration?
2 He Would Have Missed Out On The First Black President
Is Rush racist? It's Difficult to pin a concrete yes or no on that one, but I can offer this as an answer - people like Rush will find anyone to besmirch and degrade ANYONE that isn't like them. Be it race, color, creed, where you buy your clothes, or what you eat for dinner, Rush is going to be sure that he talks enough shit just south of the "if I say this, then I'm gonna be pegged a racist" line. But, would he really care if he was called one? Nope.
3 He Would Have Had To Willingly Died
He made an excuse about having hemoroids or some such nonsense in order to get out of going to Vietnam. Granted, there was a certain percentage of a chance that he could have been killed, but he was scared enough that he did what he did to make sure that he would be at home, safe. This wouldn't have happened if he were the 20th guy on the planes. He would have to know, not fear, know that he was going to die. Rush doens't have the sand to get out of his DJ booth unless he's with his fellow prattle-heads. I doubt that Rush has the courage to go to the grocery on his own to get his groceries for fear that someone might confront him. I'm sure the fear of being slapped by a woman is on par with a firey plane crash in his mind.
4 Couldn't Stand Being 20th Would Have Insisted On Being No. 1
That's right, Rush isn't one to follow. He's a "leader". Can you imagine what that day would have been like had Rush Limbaugh been the point-man, the guy that was calling all the shots? For starters, he wouldn't have been on any of the planes. And, in all likelihood, I'm sure it wouldn't have been the WTC Towers that were attacked. It would have to be something like Sean Penn's home or Bill Clinton's. And would it have even worked? Seriously, can you think of 19 other people that would be willing to die for Rush Limbaugh? Sean Hannity's pretty much a lock for strapping on a vest full of C4 and ball-bearings and walking into a public school in Queens because Limbaugh told him he would should. So I think it's safe to say that 9/11 wouldn't have happened if Rush were involved.
I know this isn't really much of a diary, just some random thoughts I wanted to share.
Can we talk about something of substance now?