Two weeks ago I quite smoking. I just quit. I even went out drinking the next night and was surrounded by smokers, and still had no desire at all to smoke. I really am excited about my experience and want to tell anyone who wants to listen how I did it. So please indulge me, I have never written a diary before, nor do I have anything I'm trying to sell. I just want everyone who currently smokes and wants to quit to do just that.
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Like I said, I quit. It wasn't the first time I've quit. For the past 6 or 7 years, every pack I bought I promised myself would be my last. Every Monday, I would make a real effort to quit. I could sometimes make it to Tuesday, a few times to Wednesday but that was usually as far as I got. And once I smoked another cigarette, I would commit right then and there to quit again on Monday.
I performed that pattern for nearly the past 3 years, week after week, month after month. I tried everything, from Pharmaceutical drugs, to the Patch, the Gum. I even was part of a clinical trail for a new Stop-Smoking drug, afterward they wouldn't tell me if I had been taking the placebo, or the real stuff. Not that it matter, nothing worked.
But that's all behind me, a growing distant memory because today I am a Non-Smoker. And this time, I did it without drugs, the Patch, the Gum and best of all without any withdrawal pains at all (well maybe a little).
Devoted Smoker
Briefly, let me give you a little background on myself, I just turned 32 in October and have been a smoker since I was 16. I've never heard anyone admit this, and maybe its because its not true for them. But I loved smoking. Loved it.
I used to joke that even though I worked 12 hour days, and couldn't technically smoke at work, I still didn't go 2 hours with out smoking. Either running to the bathroom or running outside. It was always on my mind. Every action I took, every I thing I did revolved around when and where I could smoke. I hated going to the movies, I always had to sneak out once or twice and smoke. But I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't know yourself, I just want to convey the reality of how big and important cigarettes were to me. They were everything.
But that all changed for me about 2 months ago. That day I decided things have got to change, I have got to stop smoking. Mind you, it wasn't the "I have got to stop smoking" that was different, I had always known that. What changed was the realization that I didn't know how. I was helpless. I kept thinking that I could stop smoking if I tried hard enough, and the reason I hadn't quit was because I wasn't giving it my all. I assumed I was a pathetic helpless wimp, and all i needed was to grow a pair.
I now see how wrong I was, for one thing quitting smoking isn't hard. You heard me, IT ISN'T HARD. You just have to know how. Like driving a car is really easy for me now, but it took alittle practice at first.
Knowledge is power so I spent a Saturday afternoon determined to research all the ways available to quit smoking. New ways I maybe hadn't thought of. Lucky for me the first thing I came across, was all it took.
The first thing I did was Google "Easy Stop Smoking", the first entry that came up was a book aptly named "The easy way to stop smoking" By author Allen Carr. I downloaded the Audio version and spent the next 2 days listening to it. Let me be clear, I didn't completely stop smoking the next day. Though I have now heard lots of stories that many people have. In my own defense, I live with a smoker and work with lots of smokers. (I own a bar/Restaurant) but it did fundamentally change how I looked at cigarettes, I honestly felt that quitting was now just a matter of time.
Now this isn't a diary simple to promote this man's book, though the point is to read it, I strongly suggest listen to the audio version. I'm taking the time to write this because I think there is something more I can contribute.
Change your Thinking
I'm not sure if Allen Carr knows why his "method" is so successful. I would guess that he does and by that I mean the mechanics of how it works. How if you listen to the book properly it effects the smokers brain. Though the author, never goes into any detail about human physiology, about how the brain works. Maybe knowing why doesn't really matter. But like I said, knowledge is power and I think that knowing how it works can help you get better results out of the book.
While reading the Carr's book, I was reminded of another book I read many years ago by Tony Robbins, the self help guru. In it(I forget which one) Mr Robbins puts forth the notion that human beings are driven by two primary forces, the desire for pleasure and the motivation to avoid pain.
Not a radical concept, but a powerful one. Your mind will do almost anything to avoid pain, most time with you never realizing it. Your mind also works really really hard to find pleasure and will be drawn to it. Most times with out you even knowing it. Whether we realize it or not, most of our actions are driven by these two forces. The crazy thing is what our minds decide is pleasure and what is pain might be completely screwed up. Many time they make no since.
So if you can link massive pain to smoking, and lots of pleasure to not smoking. Your mind will run from cigarettes and never look back. And thats what Allen Carr's book does. It flips you perception of smoking on its head.
The Day I quit
What fundamentally changed after reading the book was the notion that smoking gave me pleasure and at the same time took away pain. It doesn't. It's like getting pleasure out of banging your head against the wall because you feel better when you stop.
All the pains I thought smoking helped me avoid, the withdrawal symptoms, the grouchiness, the stress. Smoking didn't take them away, smoking casued them in the first place. If I felt these things, it was all because I smoked, not because I wasn't smoking.
The more I smoked, the more I began to grow disgusted with smoking. I was quitting while I was smoking. I would stare at myself in the mirror while smoking. I'd let the smoke just fall out of my mouth and I couldn't help but think how disgusted it looked. How pathetic I seemed to be trapped by these things. It really upset me to see myself this way. I would in-hail and then immediately make myself cough,(which is actually surprisingly easy because its what your body really wants to do)this would make me gag and all I could think about was how horrible these things really are. Just like the first time I smoked, cigarettes actually tasted bad.
While listening to the audio book, I would genuinely try and feel the pain the author tries to associate to smoking, and its not what you think. Also, at the same time I imagined the pleasure he tries to convey about being a Non-Smoker
But what really did it, was one morning I got angry. I mean really angry. I had stopped smoking on Monday, went as far as Wednesday and had a few cigarettes that night. The next morning I felt horrible, as always. As long as I smoked the day before, I always woke up feeling awful, irritable and cranky. I only really noticed the difference when I would try and quit for a couple days.
I immediately got in the shower to try and wake myself up.
In the shower I started to get angry, when I realized I had run out of shampoo (it was easy because I felt angry). And unlike before I embraced my feelings. I didn't try and fight it. This time I knew it wasn't because I HADN'T smoked a cigarette that made me feel upset. I knew it was because I HAD smoked last night in the first place. I literally started screaming;
"FUCK THIS SH!T"!!!
"I CAN'T STAND FEELING THIS WAY."
"AND ITS ALL BECAUSE I SMOKE. CIGARETTES MAKE ME FEEL THIS AWFUL".
My fists where clenched, my voice was loud and mad, I stood there angry for a good minute or two, the water running down my back.
And thats it.
I associated so much pain, real in the moment pain with smoking. That I walked out of that shower, never wanting a cigarette again. I don't mean I now had the "drive" to stop smoking, I mean the urge to smoke was completely gone. I went out drinking with some friends the next night who smoke. And I wanted nothing to do with cigarettes. In fact the smoke in the air started to make me sick, physically sick.
Looking back now, it really saddens me to think about all the energy and misery I wasted "trying" to quit. But now looking back I see, I wasn't really trying.
Well I hope my story helps. It definitely helped me to write it
::
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