Welcome to today's Pootie an Woozle diary. Mah name is Andy teh cat.
Let me see, whut shud we do?
Hey, dis plant look like a microphone.
Dat give me idea.
Ai will sing yus an inspirational song togird yor loins an galvanize yor souls in dese trubbeled times.
Ai knows just teh one.
Yu had bedder get out yor hankies, cause yus will be cryin’ like baybees before ai done.
Ladies an gennelmen, everybuddy want teh best in life. An everybuddy love noms. An everybuddy knows dat teh best noms, teh noms we dream of, teh expensive tuna-flavored crunchy ones dat are doled out mebbe once a week, are in a jar on top of teh fridge. Most pooties and woozles is content to take whatever noms life gives dem. But some are dreamers, and dey vows to gets to dat heavenly jar. Dis song go out to dem. **Ahem**
To dream teh impossible dream
To fights teh unbeadable foe
To bear wid unbearable hungries
To runs where teh brave dus not goes
To rights dis unrightable wrong
To luff tuna's taste from afar
To tries when yor paws are too weary
To reach teh unreachable jar!
Dis are mah quest!
To topple dat jar!
No matters how HOPELESS
No matters how...
(WHUMP)
...
Yus heathens! Not yu recognize teh next Caruso when yus hears him?
Now if yus don't mind, ai will FINISH teh rest of mah song.
Whump whump WHUMP whump whump WHUMP whump Whump whump whump whump WHUMP WHUMP WHUMP
Ai wish Trizza wud finish her nap. Dese pootie people a tough crowd.