Yesterday, SomethingTheDogSaid wrote a diary about Conservatives controlling the selection of textbooks in Texas. It stayed on the wreck list all day, and spawned quite a few lively conversations. I was involved in the conversation that sprang up about homeschooling, and in that, was challenged by several commentors about the choice to move my kids out of public school. Their main thrust seemed to be that it wasn't fair to make a choice for my kids that other, more disadvantaged kids might not have.
In my response, I brought up the issue that I think is very pressing for many urban and suburban liberals, from Obama on down...ie, how far am I willing to sacrifice my own children's education in order to achieve social justice? Follow me over the fold for more...
First, a little history. I am a product of public schools, and my father served on the school board in our town from the year I entered kindergarten until he handed my my diploma. I fully support the Ideaof a free and fabulous education for all. I grew up in Southern California in the 60s and 70s, and I feel I got what amounted to a pretty fair public education for that time period. The schools I attended were mostly white, mostly middle class, although there was some Latino population, I don't think it amounted to a large percentage.
So when I had kids, as you can imagine, I never had any question that I would send them to public school. Some unusual things happened along the way...
First, before we had kids, my husband and I had custody of a niece and nephew for about 2 1/2 years. They were 4 and 8 when they came to live with us, from my meth addicted brother, and they had been living in squalid and neglected conditions for most of their lives. If you've had a situation like this in your family, you know it's always hard.
So we got to "practice", so to speak, with public schools before our own kids got there. This was in Northern California, on the Oakland border, in a fairly middle class but racially diverse school. It was considered a good school in a good district. My niece had some challenges, as you can imagine, and I was shocked to find that I could not get any help for her. Turns out, since she was at about the 30th percentile in performance, she wasn't low enough to merit intervention. Hmmm. This doesn't sound right, aren't we supposed to take them all and move them forward? She had come from a very poor, very rural district in SoCal. I quickly realized that she could read at a very high level, but with little or no comprehension. But due to her background, she was a consummate pleaser and was very able to fake her way through the early grades. Things didn't get tough until about 5th grade when she couldn't use her survival skills to fake her way through anymore. I was promptly told by her teacher that she was just lazy. Despite my continued explanations of her background, my getting myself on a first name basis with the principal, and volunteering in the school, I advocated for her for 2 years and was finally told by the principal that I needed to take her to a doctor and have her diagnosed with ADD and then they could assign more resources to her. But she very obviously did not have ADD. She had some other learning disabilities, it was clear to me as a layperson, but as I wasn't an educator, I had trouble negotiating the system (and frankly, we were dealing with an overwhelming circumstance of other issues with them)and I was unwilling to get a diagnosis for her that would follow her and was clearly incorrect.
I did however, see a lot of good in this school. Many good teachers, many parent volunteers (key IMO to a school's success), a caring community. I wrote the problems off as unique to our situation, and as the kids went back to a parent shortly after that, I let it go. I learned many things that I figured would help me when my own kids got to public school. My oldest was born in 1996, about the time that these kids went back to their mom.
My experiences with these children did change many, many of my preconceived notions of parenting and were definitely the key reason why I chose to stay home with my kids rather than work and put them in day care. My husband and I adjusted our lifestyle, as an engineer, he makes a reasonable living, and we quickly realized that we would have to leave California. There was no way we could see on one income to live in a "good" school district, have an affordable house, and not have a killer commute. Two out of three was all we could achieve in the Bay Area.
So off we went to the Midwest, where we moved into a very upper middle class school district in Western Michigan. 98% of graduates college bound sort of district. Expectations were high,there were projects and auctions to raise money, and teachers complaining about too many volunteers and that they cannot afford to live in the district they teach in. Achievement naturally followed. Hmmm, this has it's problems too. I can see that the kids are going to get a good education, but what would the price be in terms of their social development? Not to mention the religious pressure. It's Bush-Rush loving country. And to top it off, one of my kid's classmates has a Mom who is a principal in an urban district, just a few miles away, with 100% minority and 98% free and reduced price lunch. I have a friend who teaches in a rural district and describes the needs of those kids. I begin to understand that we are in the wrong place. This is early, kindergarten, first grade years. While I want my kids to have this great education, I do not want them to grow up to think the whole world is white and rich. Parenting is a learn as you go endeavor, and I have to admit, living in West Michigan in the Bush years also defined my politics in much sharper terms than I ever had to consider in California.
Next up, husband is offered an assignment to Seattle. That's more like it. Back to the West Coast, lowest religious observance in the county, diversity, progressives. Yes, we can do this. We choose a school and a district in Suburban Seattle, because of a magnet program that is similar to a program we've been in in Michigan. It's a high ranked district, but a school with lower rankings, much economic and racial diversity. Perfect I think. I jump in with both feet. Volunteering, joining the PTA board, am offered a part time job at the school. And within months, I am horrified.
The expectations for these kids are so much lower than we saw in Michigan it's laughable. I sit in meetings with teachers who talk about not having time to teach science or social studies because they have to spend so much time on reading both because of testing and because the kids are so disadvantaged that they have to catch them up. This is a school with about 40% minority and 50% free lunch, so not at the bottom, but with a lot of kids in a lot of bad situations. This is supposed to be good for my kids to be here, we are supposed to be floating the boats, right? We are progressive. But my kids are bored to tears. They aren't learning because they already know the material. I'm there, volunteering and working part time and my own are falling through the cracks. There is no one seeing them, challenging them, teaching them.
My oldest is in this school for two years and in 4th grade when in a parent teacher conference, the teacher tells me that his reading level is 4th grade. Excuse me I say, but before we came here 2 years ago, he was tested at 5th grade (when he was in 2nd grade) and he just finished reading the first Lord of the Rings at home. And the 3rd grade teacher told me he aced the 6th grade test and she didn't have a higher test to give him. So either they were wrong or you are wrong. Sheepishly she says, well, I haven't really had the opportunity to test him independently because I have all these other kids who aren't at grade level, so I just marked him down as grade level. Would you like me to have the reading specialist test him?
I have story after story after story like this. I was working directly for the principal. I discussed these things with her and she blew it all off. I talked to the teachers each year about some difficulties in my son's writing, and then was told by the reading specialist who tested him that while he was reading at about 10th grade level she had concerns about his writing. Really, I said, does anybody around here keep a file or information from year to year because this has been a concern of mine since the day he came here. No, I was told, the teachers don't have access to the previous year's information. How can a child be here for 2 years and no one knows what his capabilities are?
Anyway, that's enough of our story. Shortly after this, we made a decision to homeschool our children. They are happier, they feel as if they are learning more, and we are much more relaxed as a family. But that's for another diary.
The issue I am trying to define is the struggle of urban and suburban progressives. I think this is one of the challenges of our values. How do we assure our own kids receive a good education, while adhering to our values?
White (and really mid-upper class,regardless of ethnicity) flight is real, but is it reasonable? How can schools ever be equitable for minority and disadvantaged kids? How far can I sacrifice my own child's education on the altar of social justice? I have dealt with tremendous guilt in pulling out of the public system. I want my kids to be there, but I don't see how they can be there and get the education that they need to get into college and to prosper in an ever more competitive world.
I feel as if we did everything right and yet the system didn't work for us. I was there and advocating for my kids and they still didn't get the education or attention that they needed. What about all those kids who don't have an advocate? They deserve to have me there advocating for them if they don't have someone on their own, but what price would my own kids pay for that? When is it ok to be selfish and when should we be selfless? What do I owe my own kids if I do choose to put them into this situation?
What is a progressive to do?