The New Justice League
The United States of America has become the United States of Koch. A New Justice League has risen to protect Koch from the Americans.
- Sponsored by Americans for the Prosperity of Koch
The Admiral - Jim De Mint : Attention! All unmarried female teachers, I am placing your private parts under lock and key - No Sex for You!
Mr. Constitution - Joe Miller : It's in the constitution only if I say so!
The Gatekeeper - Rand Paul : No entry for the handicapped and the coloured
Dr. Evil - John Raese : How dare you ask for more, you minimum wage earner? Taste the wrath of my laser!
Shotgun Sharon - Sharon Angle : If you are not on the list, you will be subject to second amendment remedies.
The Protector - Ken Buck : I am the Sheriff, I wear the boots in this town and you will have that baby!
The Brainiac - Ron Johnson : All climate scientists will be branded with a sunspot and placed in coolers.
The Masturbator - Christine O'Donnell : Thou shall not play with yourselves.
The Treasurer - Marco Rubio : su tarjeta de crédito es mi tarjeta de crédito (your credit card is my credit card)
The Pornographer - Carl Paladino : All smut goes through me!
The Doctor - Art Robinson : A spoonful of radioactive waste helps the medicine go down :)
The Linguist - Tom Tancredo : Solo ingles (Only English)
Mrs SS - Orly Taitz : Where's your birth certificate?
The Horse Whisperer - J.D. Hayworth : Thou shall not have sex with the horses