Worldwide grain stocks are dropping precipitously and WorldNet Daily cites strong evidence that some government agencies are stockpiling large amounts of canned food!!!!
This is all a CONSPIRACY to starve real AMERICANS. But there's a solution! SURVIVAL SEEDS! And we've got them, all of them. So you're going to have to pay up $$$$$.....
Actually that's just what you heard on Glenn Beck's show a few dozen times while Eric Massa was talking about his salty language, tickle fights, and Rahm in the nude. What am I talking about? If you missed it, well count yourself lucky for not wasting an hour of your life.
So yeah, we don't have any survival seeds. But it is spring time and that means it's time for a Netroots Nation auction! And we're kicking it off today, so please stop by and bid liberally.
We started by doing one auction a year in the fall, and it has been a blast. Then we added a holiday bazaar featuring only hand crafted items from the community, and it was a smash. It won the war on Christmas in fact. So now we're back with a spring auction and we've got some fantastic items on offer.
Since we're not parting with the Survival Seeds quite yet, you'll need to bid on this photo of a spring orchid taken in Chicago's Lincoln Park Conservatory.
And if you're still scratching your head about Beck and all this survival seeds nonsense what you really need is a signed copy of Markos' forthcoming book titled American Taliban.
It wouldn't be a Netroots Nation auction without all kinds of great items from our community and here are just a few to pique your interest. Bill in Portland Maine has assembled a super awesome fun pack for your enjoyment. Or check out this Pootie shawl. Or how about 1 month of twitter services from PPST?
Or when you head out to Vegas for Netroots Nation this summer, stay in style at the Masquerade suite at the Rio Hotel. Party's in your room! If you want to take a break from the action we've also got these tickets to see Cirque du Soleil's Mystere at Treasure Island during the convention.
Finally, you can have our very own Jeff Lieber write a 500 word diary of your choice. We may have to draft him, or I'll be forced to write about the next batch of crazy on Glenn Beck's show.
All of these generous donations, and your bids, are critical to helping us continue to do the work we're doing. We thank you in advance for bidding early and often!
We'll see you in Vegas, and we promise we won't tickle you while using salty language if you bid liberally.
I've gotta go start plowing my backyard to plant my crisis garden, see you in the comments.