It looks like our friends over in the Republican party went all in ... and ... well, lost. So what are the options left to them? As they shuffle out of the high stakes Texas Hold'em room, below the fold are some of the choices they can consider -- feel free to add your own if you enjoy torturing metaphors.
Option One -- Wait in the parking lot with a tire iron, beat your winning opponent senseless and take your money back, mumbling under your breath things that will make you feel better ... he was a lowlife, had it coming to him, probably stole the money anyway, cheated, is a n****r or a f****t or anything but a God-fearing anti-commie Amerikan. Of course, you have to leave town fast because you may be a suspect.
Option Two -- A variation on Option One. Go round up the boys for an old fashion whoop-ass. Slip them some good stuff to drink (not sake), tell them that the lowlifes who had the audacity to cheat at the table were also whistling at their sisters or saying some unflattering things about their mothers. Get them riled up -- point out the target and stand on the sidelines ready to swoop in and scoop up the cash when it gets knocked loose. If you get caught with the cash, you could always claim you were just trying to be a good citizen making sure that nothing happened to the money and that it would get back to the rightful owner. In the worst case scenario you might at least get a finders fee!
Option Three -- Go the the Pit Boss and argue that it was a fix, a cheat, a lie, rules were violated, cards were counted, signals were passed, house limits were exceeded. Try anything that may work. If you've got a relationship with a Pit Boss named Roberts or Alito or Thomas or Scalia, you may be able to have your winning opponent stopped, have his winnings confiscated while the tapes are reviewed. It's even better if you can get 30 friends from various other places to claim the game was fixed and talk to the pit bosses on your behalf.
Option Four -- Go on back home, make a bunch more money and come back to play again determined to kick their ass the next time. Of course, the winner has a lot more to work with than you do and based on your recent performance, you may have a tough time raising a stake from some of your big friends -- especially since they gave you that enormous stake you just blew. They may be looking for a different player to back -- maybe even a winner with a track record. Of course, that assumes it's smart money.
Option Five -- Just quit the game. It stopped being fun a few years ago and maybe its time to head over to the craps table. Don't ever take the dice, don't even lay down a bet yourself .... just advise people about how to bet and every time they score, they might tip you. If your advice turns out to be no good, just shuffle off to another table or another saloon.
It will be very interesting to see how this one plays out.