I'm sure nearly everyone on this site has read at least parts of one of the four diaries recently posted by Florida4Obama, concerning her nephew being "outed", and all the heartache that has since caused. We know that this was all caused by the "good" fundamentalist Christian parents and their "good" fundamentalist Christian friends, who all attend their "good" fundamentalist Christian school and "good" fundamentalist Christian church.
So I thought you all might like to see what happened awhile back when one of the Fundy Christian types died and actually had his meeting with God. (Don't ask me how I acquired this transcript, I've promised not to divulge the source.)
(This is actually only a part of the whole transcript. The original was over twice as long, but I've since misplaced it. If I find it in the near future, I'll update. But for now, this is pretty much from memory... the best I can do right now.)
Mr. Fundy A. Christian dies and is now standing in front of God. He says to Fundy, "So, I see you went to church every Sunday, sometimes more often. I see you paid a bunch of money to the church, and that you went around trying to make converts. And you read the Bible... a LOT. What did you think about it? I mean, I'm really wondering what you thought about some of the Old Testament stuff. What did you think about my 'rules' I set out, about punishing non-believers? And what about how I rewarded my children for doing my work, even if that meant them going out and killing thousands of people?"
Fundy: "I LOVED it. You being the creator and all, you had a perfect right to do whatever you wanted. And I think those who followed your orders were totally righteous men. I've tried to do the same. I just wish I could stone a few homosexuals like they used to do back in the day. Of course it's illegal now, but if you had asked me to..."
God: "So. As long as the Bible said it, you believed it, right? You believed what the Bible said about ME?"
Fundy: "Of course."
God: "Do you ever stop to think WHY I would do such things? If I was 'good' as I'm portrayed as, then why I would do such things? Didn't some of it seem WRONG to you?"
Fundy: "Who am I to think what's right or wrong. I just do whatever you want me to do. If you say it's good and right, then it IS."
God: "No matter whether it hurt innocent people."
Fundy: "Right. It's all about doing what you, what the Bible says. YOU inspired every word in that book, after all."
God: "Well, you know what? I had NOTHING to do with that so-called Good Book! I appreciate there are some parts of it that inspire people to do good, but there are also many other parts that... ARE YOU SERIOUS?! You REALLY believe that I would sit up here and order people to kill innocent people? To encourage people to make other people's lives miserable simply because they didn't BELIEVE the right thing, or didn't WORSHIP me? Did you not have a mind of your own? Did you not CARE about other people?!"
Fundy: "But.. but..."
God: "Get out of my sight."
Fundy: "No! You're not sending me to...."
God: "No, don't worry. I'm not that kind of a god, remember. No, you get to stay here. But don't expect to live in a mansion like you were probably told. Nope, even though it's kinda run-down, your one-bedroom flat will keep the rain off you. And you won't go hungry, but don't expect anything fancy either. Oh, and I do NOT wanna hear you whining when you see that gay kid... you remember him don't you? The kid who killed himself after you and your church buddies harrassed him? Yeah... don't complain when you see him living up on the hill next to me, and driving around in his Bugatti."
Fundy: "I'm so sorry..."
God: "You sure are."