There is only one rule of presidential campaigning: get the media to talk about you. For free, if possible. Towards this end, candidates, maybe-candidates and aspiring maybe-candidates are all willing (and at this point, required) to engage in farcical numbers of "important announcements", "important policy speeches", "important completely non-political family bus vacations", and so on. The most basic step of all, simply
telling people whether you're running for president or not, now has been drawn out into something more akin to a 12-step program. But with more steps.
So let's say you're running for president. You can't just announce that: that would blow six to twelve months of free publicity. You have to announce it in a long, drawn-out process that squeezes every bit of juice from that ripe bit of political fruit.
Here's what I was able to come up with as the actual modern "steps" towards announcing that you are, in fact, trying to run for the damn presidency. A hat tip to Georgia for finding linkable examples for every step... from the exact same candidate.
1. Getting called "a possible contender" on cable TV, or calling yourself a contender
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich says he's among a handful of Republican candidates who are thinking about running for president in 2012. "I think I'm probably on a list of seven or eight possible candidates at this stage," Gingrich reportedly told reporters in North Carolina Wednesday before speaking to a gathering of conservatives. Joe DeSantis, Gingrich's communications director, confirmed the accuracy of the quotes to CNN
1/14/2011
2. Letting a friend leak that you're "considering a run"
"Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich intends to take a formal step toward entering the 2012 presidential race within the next two weeks, Republican officials said Sunday, after months spent traveling to important primary and caucus states. These officials declined to say precisely what type of announcement the 67-year-old former Georgia lawmaker would make, but added they expect him to make clear his determination to run."
2/27/2011
3. Saying yourself that you're "considering a run"
Newt Gingrich, former Republican House Speaker, said he may decide this month whether he will set up a committee to explore running against President Barack Obama in 2012… "I'll probably make a decision by the end of this month about whether or not to set up an exploratory committee," Gingrich said.
2/13/2011
4. Announcing the possible formation of an exploratory committee
Former House speaker Newt Gingrich will announce tomorrow that he is entering the "explore phase" of a bid to seek the 2012 GOP presidential nomination, CBS News has learned.
3/1/2011
5. Announcing the actual formation of that exploratory committee
Newt Gingrich, the former House speaker, took the first official step toward running for the 2012 Republican presidential nomination on Friday byfiling paperwork with the Internal Revenue Service to explore a potential candidacy
3/4/2011
6. Announcing that over the next few months, you may be announcing
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said he hopes to jump into the race for president "within a month," noting that he's already made visits to key states like Iowa and New Hampshire and has beefed up his political staff. "I think within a month, we will have that taken care of and we'll be running," Gingrich said.
3/27/2011
7. Announcing that your announcement may be imminent
Newt GIngrich at Union League in Phila. Tells reporters to watch twitter and Facebook next week for Pres decision.
4/28/2011
8) Announcing that you will, in fact, be announcing something
Just got off the phone with Rick Tyler, spokesman for Newt Gingrich…Tyler wouldn’t say much, but Gingrich is scheduled to speak to Georgia Republicans at their state meeting on Friday, May 13. “By the time Newt speaks to the Georgia convention, he’ll be a candidate,” Tyler said.
5/04/2011
9. Announcing that you will be announcing something in a certain week or day
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich plans to officially enter the presidential race early next week, he told Hotline On Call before Saturday's White House Correspondents Dinner.
"I'll be in by the 10th or 11th," Gingrich said, without elaborating on where or how he would announce his candidacy.
5/1/2011
10. Announcing the date or time of your announcement
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich plans to officially enter the presidential race early next week, he told Hotline On Call before Saturday's White House Correspondents Dinner.
"I'll be in by the 10th or 11th," Gingrich said, without elaborating on where or how he would announce his candidacy.
5/1/2011
11. Announcing that your announcement will be that you're announcing that you will run
Former House speaker Newt Gingrich will announce on Wednesday that he will seek the Republican presidential nomination in 2012, a spokesman told CBS News. Gingrich spokesman Rick Tyler said Gingrich will announce the decision on Facebook and Twitter on Wednesday, and will sit down for an interview with conservative Fox News pundit Sean Hannity on Wednesday night. He plans to make his "first announcement speech" at the Georgia Republican Party convention on Friday.
5/9/2011
12. Announcing "unofficially" that your announcement for running will be imminent (within 24 hours)
Be sure to watch Hannity this Wednesday at 9pm ET/8pm CT. I will be on to talk about my run for President of the United States @seanhannity
5/9/201
13. Announcing!
Today I am announcing my candidacy for President of the United States. You can watch my announcement here. http://bit.ly/...
5/11/2011
Good show, old pro, good show.
Not shown in the above: the additional steps of saying or doing something stupid, then withdrawing from the race to spend more time with your family.