Ladies and Gentlemen, I have just returned from watching cable news, and I bring terrible news: #occupywallstreet is a total failure.
Sorry. That sucks, but there it is.
Despite mobilizing all these people, ideas, and energy, this movement is clearly doomed. Why? Because traditional media sources aren't covering it.
Without the validation of Serious People, this all means nothing. It's like David Gregory said to Mayor Bloomberg on Meet The Press Sunday: "I can't hear any of them over the sound of all the money in my pocket, rubbing together."*
But there's hope! Real media professionals can transform your message and messaging into a brand that says "I'm ready for primetime."
Look, TV cameras are big and bulky. Print reporters have to lug around those bigass notebooks. If you're going to expect them to go ALL THE WAY TO WALL STREET to cover a story, at least give them a digestible message. Thomas Friedman doesn't haul around that bigass mustache for just any ol' popular movement.
Thus:
Also posted at Crooks And Liars, where they also have a kickass pizza fund to satisfy your base human compulsion for altruism.
*I'm paraphrasing, check transcript for exact quotes.