In the wake of the political flap surrounding Howard Dean's announcement that he was seeking the votes of people with Confederate flag decals in their pick-up trucks, other candidates vying for the Democratic presidential nomination have begun to specify those voters from whom they will not accept support.
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts announced the he would not accept votes from members of the National Rifle Association. Speaking at a photo opportunity during a pheasant hunt in Iowa, the Senator said "There are certain principals that we as Democrats must stand for. If winning the election means that we have to accept the votes of assorted gun nuts and loonies I, as an avid hunter and sportsman, feel it is not an acceptable position to take."
"Of all the campaigns, we certainly have the most complete policy on Voter Purity." said a Kerry spokesman after the event. Indeed, Kerry's "Voter Acceptance and Purity Policy of 2003", which is available from the candidate's web site and weighs in at 724 pages, specifies a complex system of Voter Purity Credits which can be exchanged for the right to have one's vote for Kerry counted. Exemptions from the rules are provided for owners of Harley Davidson motorcycles and members of the Skull and Bones fraternity of Yale University.
Congressman Dennis Kucinich of Ohio, perhaps the candidate most concerned with ideologically purity, announced that he would not accept the votes of anyone who used meat or dairy products. His campaign issued a statement which read, in part: "Having very high standards we have decided that rather than an exclusionary policy which says who cannot vote for us, we will instead implement an inclusive process in which voters can pre-register at our website by filling in a voter purity questionnaire. They will then be notified by email as to whether we will permit them to vote for us."
The campaign of Carol Mosley Braun had no comment, although her spokesperson did say "If you see Carol, could you please ask her to call the office? We really need to speak with her, preferably before the caucuses."
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina said that, although he would not accept the votes of Confederate flag displaying voters he did not believe that would be costly because "that's just a stereotype of Southerners with no basis in reality. The confederation, isn't that from Star Wars or something?" Edwards also announced that he would accept the vote of anyone who believed that he or she had a valid claim for an injury arising out of negligence of another party.
Dr. Dean, replying to the criticism, was unapologetic. "I want all those votes." he said, speaking from the Barbara Bush Clinic for Anger Management, where he is spending the week. "Confederate flag wavers, gun nuts, bigots, street preachers, bad standup comics, dead people. A vote's a vote."
"I apologize if I insulted any dead people." he added, before being led away.