Anglican Kossacks is a group for discussion about Episcopalian/Anglican issues as well as issues of social justice and equality from Anglican and other perspectives. All are welcome regardless of religious tradition to participate in a respectful, thoughtful, and welcoming environment.
We have a great group from the Cathedral that brunches together most Sundays. We vary from about 5 to 12 people, depending on the Sunday, and it consists of mostly people from the choir, the organist and his wife, his assistant and his partner, my pew-partner and I (both are professional organists though he is retired) and many of us are gay or have a gay relative and all have close friends in the LGBT community if they are not part of it themselves. Hardly a good sample of how people think about marriage equality, but a good group of intelligent, liberal, thinking, compassionate people on any number of issues.
Now often the conversation turns to "shop talk", and great stories and anecdotes about our experiences in sacred music and especially in working in the Episcopal Church. Clergy and Bishops (and jokes about them) are also prominent, and there is the occasional swapping of sheet music or "you should see this piece I just discovered". Just as often, however, church and national politics come up, especially after the sermon our Dean delivered today. So, today, marriage equality was the hot topic of discussion, and I'd like to share with you some of the things we talked about today.
More over the orange incense-cloud...
In the Episcopal Church (and other denominations) today is Good Shepherd Sunday. Interestingly, however, our Dean used his sermon to talk about a conference he attended as a panelist on marriage equality and general equality in Maine with clergy from other denominations and civic leaders. It focused on "telling our stories", something LGBT activists know a lot about, and a technique which has been largely responsible for the progress in LGBT civil rights in recent decades. The story he told was a "coming out" story. Not as gay, as he is not, but as someone who evolved in taking a stand for gay rights.
Coming from a southern mid-Atlantic state parish to St. Luke's, he explained, he moved from having to bridge the gap between conservatives and liberals on marriage equality issues to having, as he said, to "finally take a stand". I was moved by his story, and so was our little brunch group of sacred music and theology geeks.
We all came away with a real understanding about the quandary that many clergy face in parts of the country where LGBT issues remain divisive in their parishes. I wasn't angry that he refused to take a stand for a long time one way or the other. In fact, I felt a great deal of compassion and understanding for why some church leaders who DO support equality do not come out in favor of it. What might look like hypocrisy or spinelessness is really a pastoral position of great consequence. It reminded me that it's not as easy as some of us think when it comes to taking a stand on social justice, and that if you're the Rector or Pastor (or Dean or Bishop or the Canon for Evangelism) the entire congregation is your flock, not just the ones you agree with. It's not like national politics at all. It's a different animal, and I felt a little bad about how judgmental I have been in the past about clergy who refuse to take a stand on this issue. I've worked in the church more than half my life and should know better. Our Dean gave me a lot to think about today. I should note that the sermon was not political in nature, and did not tell anyone how to vote, but was a personal account of the Dean's position on the issue. He is very visible throughout the state as an advocate for social justice of all kinds and is well-known to politicians and activists of all stripes here in Maine..
That being said, when we got to brunch, we very quickly turned to Dean Shambaugh's sermon, especially as Maine faces a ballot initiative this November which would either restore or not marriage equality to the Pine Tree State. So, here were some points discussed and agreed on:
1. The Dean was correct in his assessment that the Episcopal Church and mainstream denominations in general have not done a good job of getting our message of radical welcome and total inclusion of all persons out into society at large. "If we were, people would be flocking to the Episcopal Church", he had said. This calls for a lot of reflection, and more effort from Diocesan and National Convention. That being said, the National Church and the various Diocese are still having to bridge the gap between factions on this issue. How we move forward is a top priority, and not one to send into committee to be "studied" for another ten years as is our wont in the ECUSA.
2. If all churches got out of the "marriage business", there is no longer an argument that equality infringes on anyone's religious liberty. My old parish in Boston made the decision years ago that Rectors will not sign State marriage certificates for any couple and that all couples married in the church must obtain a civil servant's signature on a civil marriage certificate. All the clergy will do is conduct the church ceremony and enter the marriage into the parish's sacramental record.
3. Conservative Christians are not the only ones who oppose marriage equality. This was a large part of the conversation. There are LGBT folks who oppose same-sex marriage on the grounds that it encourages heteronormative behavior and undermines the distinct, unique culture of LGBT persons and represents repression, especially against women. Many who make this argument also argue against the trend to end self-segregation of LGBT persons in queer neighborhoods, and the "suburbanization" or "mainstreaming" of LGBT folks, especially couples. The general consensus of our group was that this represents a "mirror image" of oppression from the religious right in that it attempts to dictate to others how they should live their lives. The continued integration of LGBT couples into mainstream neighborhoods has been a positive force as many people now know "the nice gay couple down the block" who are out and may even have children, and has gone a long way towards swaying the opinions of hetero folks in the direction of supporting civil rights and equality. This was expressed eloquently by one member of the group who is much older than I am, who was very passionate in his opinion that the integration of LGBT folks into "straight" society is highly important. I agree very, very strongly with that.
4. Emphasizing the real-life consequences of inequality is key both for Episcopalians and all who support marriage equality. Advertising and speeches given the last time around in support of marriage equality here in Maine tended to focus on wholesome images of functional LGBT partners and their extended families and friends. These ads and stories are very warm and fuzzy. They are also ineffective. In the face of misleading advertising from opponents, we should talk more about the consequences: show images of partners being barred from ICUs, and children ripped away from the surviving same-sex partner of a deceased spouse by blood family that asserts their right as "next-of-kin". These things are real, and a real consequence of inequality and bigotry. In short, we're not doing enough to paint the true reality of the situation.
5. All human life has dignity. No, I'm not saying "every sperm is sacred". I'm talking about living, walking, human beings. We had a Baptism today, and I thought about that phrase that shows up in the Baptismal Rite, "we respect the dignity of all human life". That has become politically charged in recent decades, when really, it's pretty simple. You don't respect the dignity of human life when you do not respect the civil rights of your fellow humans. Another opportunity to re-claim religious language and ideas in the service of radical welcome and universal love as Jesus teaches us: "Love one another as I have loved you".
Thanks for reading this. I wish many more Christians took up these issues informally as our little brunch group does, though I know many others do. Love and blessings to all.
What say you? I invite--no, encourage--discussion in the comments.