Well, there's still a few million votes to be tallied, but here's the latest figures from Google Politics & Elections:
Barack Obama 50.6% 61,910,594 332
Mitt Romney 47.9% 58,654,765 206
OK, that much we knew. When the final figures are in, it's likely to end up with Obama at around 65 million and Romney with around 60 million (which, interestingly, is virtually identical to John McCain's total, which tells you something about the high water mark of the Republican Party, as an aside).
However, below the Doily from Hell, let's look at the other candidates:
First up, of course, are Libertarian Gary Johnson and Green Party candidate Jill Stein; Johnson should actually be quite pleased with the results on marijuana legalization in several states, if nothing else:
Gary Johnson 1.0% 1,191,420
Jill Stein 0.3% 420,515
However, after this we get into the quirkier candidates. Here's the rundown. You'll recognize a few of the names, including:
--Rosanne Barr, running on primarily a medical marijuana candidacy; like Gary Johnson, she should be pretty satisfied as well. 52,000 people voted for her.
--Rocky Anderson, former Democrat and former mayor of Salt Lake City; he left the party to run to the left of Obama with the Justice Party. Interesting guy, especially given that he was a liberal guy running a city in the middle of Utah. He got 38,000 votes.
This one is both frightening and kind of odd, as Google lists him twice (once as Tom, once as Thomas, with the same vote count):
--Tom (Thomas?) Hoefling ran under "America's Party", founded by Alan Keyes, which pretty much says it all. About 31,000 nutcases voted for this guy.
--Remember anti-abortion extremist, abortion photo fetishist and all-around asshole Randall Terry? He actually tried to run as a Democrat, then ended up running as an independent. He only got 13,000 disturbed individuals to vote for him.
--Chuck Baldwin ran on the Reform Party line in Kansas, even though he's supposed to be a member of the Constitution Party. He garnered 4,700 votes.
--Andre Barnett was the "national" Reform Party candidate, or something. He received 4,700 votes as well.
--Former Democrat, then Independent, then Republican, and finally Constitution Party candidate Virgil Goode was supposed to cause Mitt Romney major headaches in Virginia, but ended up only getting 4,100 votes; fortunately, Obama beat Romney by over 115,000 votes in Virginia anyway.
--Jack Fellure ran on, believe it or not, the Prohibition Party ticket. And yes, their platform is exactly what you think it is. He received 519 votes.
No clue about the rest of the names below, but some of you might recognize a few of them:
Roseanne Barr 52,525
Rocky Anderson 38,380
Thomas Hoefling 30,802
Tom Hoefling 30,802
Jerry Litzel 12,986
Jeff Boss 12,986
Randall Terry 12,986
Merlin Miller 12,986
Jill Reed 12,148
Richard Duncan 12,148
None of these candidates 5,753
Andre Barnett 4,737
Chuck Baldwin 4,737
Barbara Washer 4,737
Virgil Goode 4,150
Will Christensen 4,150
Tom Stevens 4,066
Stewart Alexander 3,946
James Harris 3,792
Jim Carlson 3,172
Sheila Tittle 2,504
Peta Lindsay 1,521
Gloria La Riva 1,521
Jerry White 1,130
Dean Morstad 1,106
Jack Fellure 519
Update: Thanks to Justus in the comments for pointing to
this site, which lists EVERY Presidential candidate who ran, including links to their websites where possible.
Here's an additional 108 candidates (mostly write-ins)...I presume that all of them received at least 1 vote (their own):
Dorothy "Doc" Adams (Independent-Texas)
Avery Ayers (Independent-Texas)
Jeff Block (Independent-Georgia)
Tiffany Briscoe (Independent-Maryland) Whence Brown (Independent-Washington)
Darryl Bryant (Write In-Georgia)
Robert "Naked Cowboy" Burck (Independent-New York)
Lester Byerley Jr. (Tea-New Jersey)
President Emperor Caesar (Independent-Florida)
Hal Chad Carrington-Hayes (Independent-Arizona)
Jerry Carroll (Independent-California)
Joseph Charles (Independent-Texas)
Paul Chehade (Independent-Florida)
Liza Dawn Cherricks (Independent-Delaware)
Santa Claus (Write In-Nevada)
Todd Clayton Jr. (Constitutionalist-Washington)
Douglas Clement (Independent-Missouri)
Floyd Conover (Independent-Tennessee)
James Cooper (Michigan)
Don Cordell (Write In-California)
Sanford Cramer III (Independent-California)
Christopher Dardzinski (Write In-Michigan)
Fred Donald Dickson Jr. (Write In-Maryland)
Michael Doname (Independent-New York)
Jim Duensing (Boston Tea Party-Nevada)
Stephen Durham (Freedom Socialist Party-New York)
Michael David Elder (Independent-Texas)
John "Green" Ferguson (Eco Green Party-Texas)
Ronald Gascon (Write In-Pennsylvania)
Jackie Gouge (Independent-Texas)
Mark B. Graham (Citizens-West Virginia)
Ken Grammer (Independent-Virginia)
J. Paul Hadd (Write In-Pennsylvania)
Bob Hall (Independent-Illinois)
William Harney (Independent-Florida)
Rutherford Bert Hayes (Independent-Arkansas)
Craig Hermann (Independent-Florida)
RaeDeen Heupel (Independent-Montana)
Thaddaus Hill (Madisonian Federalist-Texas)
Darrell Hillis (Independent-Tennessee)
John Hoelzel Jr. (Independent-Texas)
Samuel Hoff (Independent-Delaware)
Brian Holland (National Socialist Movement-Virginia)
"Mad Mike" Hughes (Independent-California)
Darrell Hykes (Independent-Georgia)
Michael Jenkins (Write In-Texas)
Ronald D. Jones (Independent-Florida)
Terry Jones (Independent-Florida)
Scott Keller (Independent-Florida)
Nelson Keyton (Independent-Virginia)
Dennis Knill (Independent-Arizona)
Tollefsen Kristen (Independent-Virginia)
Gott Johan Josephe Lally (Independent-Vermont)
Temperance Alesha Lance-Council (Anti-Hypocrisy-California)
Jerry Lanser (Independent-Colorado)
David Larson (American Independent-California)
Robert Lee (Independent-Virginia)
Brad Lefler (Independent-Ohio)
Michael "Lev" Levinson (Independent-Florida)
Sophia the Logos (Independent-Virginia)
Love-22 (Write In-California)
Ed Maddox (Independent-South Dakota)
James McCall (Independent-Ohio)
Richard McCormick (Kis-Washington)
Ron McCune (Independent-Florida)
David McFadden (Independent-Ohio)
J.L. Mealer (Independent-Arizona)
Albert Morzuch (Independent-Florida)
Bill Nees (Write In-Georgia)
John Parmele Jr. (Independent-Virginia)
Mark Pimentel (Independent-Florida)
Matthew David Pinnavaia (Independent-California)
Samuel "Uncle Sam" Powell (Independent-District of Columbia)
Rajesh Raghavan (Independent-Maryland)
Arthur Rakowitz (Independent Party-Texas)
Luis Ramos Jr. (Write In-New York)
Rich Reed (Independent-Kansas)
John Karl Reiman (Independent-California)
"Mad Max" Riekse (Citizens-Michigan)
Platt Robertson (Write In-Nevada)
Rick Rogers (Independent-Washington)
Billy Roper (Nationalist-Arkansas)
Paul Rosenberger (Independent-California)
Laurie Roth (Independent-Washington)
Dan Rozelle (Independent-Indiana)
Donald Sauter (Independent-Delaware)
Francis Savarirayan (Independent-Illinois)
"Average Joe" Schriner (Independent-Ohio)
Larry Schuetter (United Third Party-California)
Stephen Shadden (Independent-Oklahoma)
William Shaw (Independent-Illinois)
James Dee Shinn (Independent-West Virginia)
Montgomery Blair Sibley (Write In-District of Columbia)
Jeff Siggins (Write In-Delaware)
Charles Smith (Write In-Pennsylvania)
David Jon Sponheim (America's Third Party-Washington)
Gary Stark (Independent-California)
Scott Allen Meek Stephens (Independent-New York)
Vincent Stieber Jr. (Independent-Ohio)
Vermin Supreme (Independent-Massachusetts)
Charles Tolbert (Independent-Florida)
Anthony Tubbs (Independent-Louisiana)
Douglas "Dutch" Van Raam (Independent-Arizona)
Da Vid (Light Party-California)
George Washington Williams (Independent-Ohio)
Andrew Wildman (Independent-Louisiana)
Jerry Wilson (Write In-Tennessee)
Michael "Doc" Witort (Independent-Illinois)
Danny Woodring (Write In-Florida)