Last night, Stephen Colbert looked at the Fast & Furious scandal that's got the right-wing in full outrage mode, and looked at how unhinged these people have become, like Joe the Plumber.
Since 2011, folks, California representative and Slytherin house master Darrell Issa has demanded key documents that Attorney General Eric Holder has brazenly withheld on the flimsy excuse that they would endanger undercover agents. Folks, that's too convenient. I think that Holder is hiding a far more sinister truth.
RUSH LIMBAUGH (12/31/2011): Fast & Furious ... You know what that was about? ... Let's get some guns from some Arizona gun shops into the hands of some drug cartels, and let them start wiping people out. Then we'll spread the news that those guns came from American....
KATIE PAVLICH, TOWNHALL.COM (4/17/2012): They're flooding Mexico with guns so they can turn around and say, look at all these guns showing up in violent crime scenes in Mexico. We absolutely have to regulate these gun shops in America.
REP. DARRELL ISSA, R-CA (12/8/2011): Very clearly, they made a crisis, and they're using this crisis to somehow take away or limit people's Second Amendment right.
Yes, very clearly, Obama started this gun tracking program in 2006 when he hypnotized George Bush.
Then he secretly ordered Attorney General Holder to order the Justice Department to order the ATF to order gun shops to sell guns to Mexican drug cartels, and then lose track of them, thereby panicking Americans to gin up support for the draconian gun control measures that Obama has never introduced.
Complicated? Yes. The fevered ramblings of a syphilitic brain? Perhaps.
Video and full transcript below the fold.
Now folks, not that Mexico isn't still a problem in its own right. Case in point, the Obama administration's ongoing cover-up of Operation Fast & Furious. I mean, I'm so mad about this, folks, just thinking about Fast & Furious makes me... I don't know, quickly angry. Fast & Furious is the biggest scandal in history... that I have ever forgotten to talk about. But, luckily, Fox News did not.
SEAN HANNITY (10/7/2011): ... Operation Fast & Furious ...
LOU DOBBS (4/28/2012): ... Operation Fast & Furious ...
MEGYN KELLY (6/19/2012): ... Operation Fast & Furious ...
LAURA INGRAHAM (8/17/2011): Operation Fast & Furious. That was that botched sting where the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms sold millions of dollars worth of weapons to violent Mexican drug cartels.
Yes, Fast & Furious was an unconscionable waste of money to promote senseless acts of violence, just like the movies it was named for.
Since 2011, folks, California representative and Slytherin house master Darrell Issa has demanded key documents that Attorney General Eric Holder has brazenly withheld on the flimsy excuse that they would endanger undercover agents. Folks, that's too convenient. I think that Holder is hiding a far more sinister truth.
RUSH LIMBAUGH (12/31/2011): Fast & Furious ... You know what that was about? ... Let's get some guns from some Arizona gun shops into the hands of some drug cartels, and let them start wiping people out. Then we'll spread the news that those guns came from American....
KATIE PAVLICH, TOWNHALL.COM (4/17/2012): They're flooding Mexico with guns so they can turn around and say, look at all these guns showing up in violent crime scenes in Mexico. We absolutely have to regulate these gun shops in America.
REP. DARRELL ISSA, R-CA (12/8/2011): Very clearly, they made a crisis, and they're using this crisis to somehow take away or limit people's Second Amendment right.
Yes, very clearly, Obama started this gun tracking program in 2006 when he hypnotized George Bush.
Then he secretly ordered Attorney General Holder to order the Justice Department to order the ATF to order gun shops to sell guns to Mexican drug cartels, and then lose track of them, thereby panicking Americans to gin up support for the draconian gun control measures that Obama has never introduced.
Complicated? Yes. The fevered ramblings of a syphilitic brain? Perhaps. But, Occam's Razor says, my answer is right, or I will cut you with a razor. Well folks, to put a stop to this very clear plot, today, Congress took action.
DYLAN RATIGAN (6/20/2012): The vote has just come through here. The Issa House panel has found Holder in contempt of Congress.
Shocking! That they found someone who didn't already hold Congress in contempt.
And folks, we know our gun rights are precious. As Ohio congressional hopeful Joe the Candidate the Plumber illuminates in his powerful new ad.
SAMUEL WURZELBACHER: In 1911, Turkey established gun control. From 1915 to 1917, 1.5 million Armenians, unable to defend themselves were exterminated. In 1939, Germany established gun control. From 1939 to 1945, six million Jews and seven million others unable to defend themselves were exterminated. I love America.
(shocked audience laughter)
I love America too. I mean, where else can you spend an afternoon just shootin' produce and talkin' about the Holocaust? (wild audience applause) Where else? Not Iran. Can't do that in Iran. They deny produce ever happened.
And folks, Joe the Plumber's right. You take away unfettered access to weapons, and the streets run with blood. I mean, just look at New York City, which has severely restricted gun permits since 1911. Now sure, there's been no genocide yet, but every year, thousands of New Yorkers are sent to camps, and forced to make lanyards and potholders.
Joe knows that without our guns, we'd be exterminated by fascist fruits and vegetables. And whaddaya know? Michelle Obama happens to grow organic carrots and cabbage at the White House! That can only lead to creeping Sharia slaw!
Of course, liberals were outraged at Joe suggesting that gun control led to the Holocaust. That's why his pre-teen spokesman Phil cleared up the misunderstanding by implying that gun control also led to slavery. Quote: "Well, blacks weren't allowed to own guns in the South, that's a historical fact as well."
Yes. Yes, sadly slaves couldn't fight the slaveholders because they were only given 3/5s of a gun. In fact, every bad thing in history was caused by gun control. The dinosaurs wouldn't have gone extinct if they could've defended themselves against that asteroid.
And you know, as a Christian, I just wish Jesus had been packing.
"Hey Judas, you want 30 pieces of silver? Would you settle for 30 pieces of lead? Tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat!!"
(wild audience applause)
I'm telling you, finally, the Gospels would've had a happy ending. We'll be right back.
He also looked at how Asian Americans are now the
fastest-growing immigrant population in the U.S.
He then had another
Thought for Food segment, looking at the new Doritos Tacos.
Meanwhile, Jon also covered Issa's House contempt charge against Holder, before turning to our hopeless media dissecting the body language between Obama and Putin at the G20 summit.
He then looked at how both Obama and Romney, and their surrogates, are handling
hecklers at their public events.
Stephen interviewed
Newsweek correspondent
Daniel Klaidman about how Obama's fighting terrorism, while Jon talked with Daily Show alum
Steve Carell.