Yesterday, US Rep Steve Stockman (R-TX) revealed his true superiority and knack for political campaigning by releasing a bumper sticker featuring the slogan, "If babies had guns they wouldn't be aborted." shifting the paradigm of political sloganeering forever.
He has subsequently been referred to as a "super genius," "complex," and "man" for this revelation.
Today, Stockman shows that it is in fact possible to hit on a goldmine more than once.
In a Daily kos exclusive, this brave blogger has surreptitiously acquired the newest messages from Stockman's brain trust, which together are sure to drive fear into every primary and Democrat opponent who futilely chooses to oppose Stockman next year.
Here they are:
"A gun for every fetus, and an oil spill for every home."
"Marriage should only be between one man and one corporation."
"Expose the liberal media bias in those Choose Your Own Adventure Books. Adventure begins at conception."
"When life gives you lemons, repeal Obamacare."
"Let's get big government out of our anti-immigration policies."
"The Bible says Adam and Eve, not universal background checks."
Talks are already in the works for expanding the messages to T-shirts, coffee mugs, stationery, and yacht decals.
If anyone else has obtained one of these deadly weapons of mass persuasion, submissions are strongly encouraged in the comment section.