Every March, millions of conservative activists and thought leaders get dressed up in their best white robes, and gather for a few days of hating on "others" and trolling for gay sex.
This year's conference featured the usual suspects, with a few notable exceptions.
Conspicuously absent from the festivities were New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie—who committed the totally unforgivable sin of publicly thanking President Obama for his efforts in the wake of Hurricane Sandy—and Virginia Gov. Bob McDonnell—who committed
the equally unforgivable sin of raising taxes.
Also excluded from the reindeer games was GOProud, which is guilty of the greatest sin of all—promoting acceptance of the homosexual lifestyle.
The void they left was filled by up-and-comers like Senators Marco Rubio and Rand Paul, down-and-outers like Rep. Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin, and total crackpots like Pam Geller and Orly Taitz, DDS, Esq.
And thanks to the inclusion of Sen. Tim Scott, former Rep. Allen West, and Dr. Ben Carson, CPAC 2013 was shaping up to be a real celebration of diversity.
But that all fell apart on Friday afternoon, when a couple of white supremacists (quite understandably) mistook a panel discussion about GOP minority outreach for a Klan rally.
Morning lineup:
Meet the Press: Rep. Chris Van Hollen (D-MD); Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA); Roundtable: Chris Matthews (MSNBC), Former Oklahoma Gov. Frank Keating (R), Former Matlamd Lt. Gov. Kathleen Kennedy Townsend (D) and Republican Strategist Ana Navarro.
Face the Nation: Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI); Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-MN); RNC Chair Reince Priebus; Roundtable: David Sanger (New York Times), Danielle Pletka (American Enterprise Institute), David Rohde (Thomson Reuters) and Richard Haass (Council on Foreign Relations).
This Week: House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH); Roundtable: George Will (Washington Post), Republican Strategist Matthew Dowd, Rep. Xavier Becerra (D-CA) and Audie Cornish (NPR); Foreign Policy Roundtable: Former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, Former National Security Adviser Stephen Hadley and Former Joint Chiefs of Staff Vice Chair Gen. James Cartwright.
Fox News Sunday: Sen. Bob Corker (R-TN); Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL); Roundtable: Bill Kristol (Weekly Standard), Nina Easton (Fortune), Republican Strategist Karl Rove and Democratic Strategist Joe Trippi.
State of the Union: Rep. Mike Rogers (R-MI); Rep. Dutch Ruppersberger (D-MD); Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (D-HI); Rep. Tom Cotton (R-TX); Al Cardenas (American Conservative Union); Democratic Strategist KiKi McLean; Rep. Raul Grijalva (D-AZ); Neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson; Reliable Sources: Lauren Ashburn (Daily-Download.com); Adam Buckman (Xfinity); Laurie Goodstein (New York Times); Sally Quinn (Washington Post); Jake Tapper (CNN); Rajiv Chandrasekaran (Washington Post); Mark Thompson (TIME); Fred Francis (Formerly of NBC News).
The Chris Matthews Show: Joe Klein (TIME); Kelly O'Donnell (NBC News); Katty Kay (BBC); Chuck Todd (NBC News).
Fareed Zakaria GPS: Former Deputy Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz; Former Pakistan Ambassador to the US Hussain Haqqani; Gayle Tzemach Lemmon (Council on Foreign Relations); Georgetown University Prof. Victor Cha; Former US Ambassador to South Korea Donald Gregg.
Up with Chris Hayes: Zainab al Suwaij (American Islamic Congress); Special Inspector General for Iraq Reconstruction Stuart Bowen; Rep. Kyrsten Sinema (D-AZ); Basma Zaiber (The List Project to Resettle Iraqi Allies); Koby Langley (Americor for Veteran Initiatives); Raed Jarrar (Arab-American Anti-Discrimination Committee); Rep. Jerrold Nadler (D-NY); Radio Host Sam Seder; Heidi Moore (The Guardian).
Evening lineup:
60 Minutes will feature: an interview with Sister Pat Farrell, the head of a group of American nuns accused by the Vatican of undermining the Church (preview); an interview with Twitter creator Jack Dorsey (preview); and, an interview with former mobster John Veasey, who claims to have has a religious awakening (preview).
On Comedy Central...
"The Daily Show" and "The Colbert Report" were in reruns this week, so there are now new videos to share. Instead, here's Jon Stewart's look at last year's CPAC.
And Stephen Colbert's recent examination of the KKK's rebranding efforts.
Note: The Daily Show and The Colbert Report will be airing reruns again this week.
Elsewhere...
Louisiana's voucher schools began teaching kids the truth about dirty fucking hippies.
They went to Canada or European countries to escape being drafted into military service.
Many young people turned to drugs and immoral lifestyles' these youths became known as hippies. They went without bathing, wore dirty, ragged, unconventional clothing, and deliberately broke all codes of politeness or manners. Rock music played an important part in the hippie movement and had great influence over the hippies. Many of the rock musicians they followed belonged to Eastern religious cults or practiced Satan worship.
Meanwhile, in other historical revisionism...
Jeb Bush offered up a rather optimistic take on his brother's legacy.
"My guess is that people will be kind to my brother," Bush said during an appearance on NBC's "Meet the Press." "The further out you get from this and the more people compare his tenure to what's going on now, I think history will be kind to George W. Bush."
He cited the popularity of former President George H.W. Bush as evidence. His father's accomplishments as president were overshadowed by the 1992 election, Bush said, but now, "everywhere I go at least, he's a beloved guy."
And, in related news...
Laura Bush welcomed all the homophobes and misogynists to the Republican party.
BURNETT: Some of the issues with women in the country, obviously, you know last time more than half the women voted for President Obama, in part because of abortion, gay marriage, issues like that. Do you think the Republican Party has made a mistake in doubling down on those issues and making social issues so central to the platform?
BUSH: Well, no, I mean, I wouldn't say that necessarily. And every candidate was different, each one of them. There were obvious examples of candidates that I think frightened some women, but they were the exception rather than the norm in the party.
All of those social issues are very, very heartfelt by people. And I understand that. There are differences. There just will be. And I’m glad that in our party we have room for all of them. I think that's important too.
What could possibly go wrong?
- Trix