Remember last week when I wrote about milestones? Apparently I was getting ahead of myself and didn't want to think about the concept too much.
Yesterday was not only this year's Mother's Day, it was also the day my older daughter graduated from law school.
My cancer was diagnosed during my daughter's second semester as a law student. I scheduled my surgery in part so that (rather selfishly) I could ask her to help me out during her spring break. She stayed with me in the hospital all night after my surgery, because I had a semi-private room with a female roommate and my husband could not stay with me himself. That summer, when I was undergoing chemotherapy, my daughter had a summer job close to home so that she could continue to offer support to me and to her little sister. Her choice, and yet....
For a while, when my chemo had failed and the cancer had metastasized to my lungs, I was not sure I'd live to see her graduate. But I have. Oh, glorious day!
I did not consciously think about this particular milestone until Thursday this week. I cried only a little bit at the ceremony. But my heart is still full of gratitude and relief, as well as joy and pride in her accomplishment. Lucky mom I am in both my daughters. Yesterday it was my oldest's turn to shine.
Monday Night Cancer Club is a Daily Kos group focused on dealing with cancer, primarily for cancer survivors and caregivers, though clinicians, researchers, and others with a special interest are also welcome. Volunteer diarists post Monday evenings between 7-8 PM ET on topics related to living with cancer, which is very broadly defined to include physical, spiritual, emotional and cognitive aspects. Mindful of the controversies endemic to cancer prevention and treatment, we ask that both diarists and commenters keep an open mind regarding strategies for surviving cancer, whether based in traditional, Eastern, Western, allopathic or other medical practices. This is a club no one wants to join, in truth, and compassion will help us make it through the challenge together.
This diary might wind up being a placeholder for another tonight, which may yet make its appearance; we'll see. (My spaciness is the problem re: scheduling.) If it winds up being the diary of record, though, that's fine. I do admit to a little bit of chagrin that I was aware on one level, but not on all, when I wrote last week's diary. These things happen, I guess. Good reason to cultivate humility where self-awareness is concerned.
Please do feel free to treat this diary as an open thread in any case.